Mandolin nightmare

**Bob A** · Apr-18-2009, 3:03pm

While this was posted in the general mandolin area, it seemed appropriate to direct attention to folks here, lest you miss it.

"I was performing "Sailor's Hornpipe" for Prof. Wilden-Hüsgen (a Germany Mandolin instructor). Right away you'd know this is a nightmare, because I can't imagine Prof. Wilden-Hüsgen thinking that Sailor's Hornpipe was an appropriate selection for a classical mandolin competition.

Half-way through she stopped me, because my timing was wrong. There I was standing on stage, horrified that my timing was wrong...and frantically started to look through my case for my metronome, and it wasn't there, of course. I had no idea what the correct timing was, but it was wrong. That's when I woke up, so I don't know if I ever got Sailor's Hornpipe right.

There isn't a chance in the world that I'd ever enter the European Mandolin Competition, and I've never met Prof. Wilden-Hüsgen. But, there you have it. Somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind...I guess I should work more on my timing. "

The original poster may have some serious issues . . . I myself have had the usual nightmares about finding myself in school without my pants, though those have gone away long ago. Nowadays, it's the folks around me who would be desperately hoping it was just a nightmare, so I leave my pants on and my mandolin at home.

**vkioulaphides** · Apr-18-2009, 4:18pm

Awful, Bob, truly awful...

Another one, "from the same book", as it were: As an orchestral musician is walking down Main Street, disheveled, haggard, with a crazed look on his face, a friend sees him, and naturally inquires whatever might have happened to him. "You can't imagine", the hapless musician replies. "I had the most TERRIBLE nightmare: I dreamed that there I was, on stage, after thirty-some seasons, playing Beethoven's Fifth for the umpteenth time." "Oh, dear", commiserates his friend, "That really is terrible, considering..."

"Ah, but that's not it", interrupts the bedraggled musician. "The worst part: I woke up and... I WAS in fact on stage, playing Beethoven's Fifth!"

As I descend into the pit tonight to play the, ah... whatever-number performance of Italian in Algiers, I must shoot up some caffeine, lest the above come true, with me in my comfy nook, resting on my trusty bass— the ONLY instrument, as I was once told by the former principal bassist of the Vienna Philharmonic, on which one can fall asleep.

Nightmares can, and DO come true. Mine just never involve the MANDOLIN, though...

Cheers,

Victor

**JeffD** · Apr-18-2009, 4:24pm

I have had several anxiety dreams that involve my mandolin being hurt or destroyed.

**JEStanek** · Apr-18-2009, 4:42pm

At least you weren't naked.

Jamie

**FrDNicholas** · Apr-18-2009, 4:58pm

This is not a dream but a true story. As a folk musician who decided to major in music, I had to audition before the classical guitar teacher. Suffice to say he was not impressed when I played "Alice's Restaurant" on my Martin guitar. His exact words were, "Oh, we have a lot of work!" (Sorry for the lack of mandolin content, but it seemed to fit the original thread.)

**John Craton** · Apr-25-2009, 7:05am

Don't know if it was a leftover from having read this thread the other day or what, but I ended up with one of these nightmares just last night. I was supposed to perform someplace (odd in itself as I haven't performed in public in years) and was only two or three hours away from the curtain when I realized that I wasn't sure I had the music memorized. I decided to run to a practice room with the music just to make sure, but between wherever I was and the practice room I set my music down someplace and spent the rest of the dream frantically trying to find it. (Now that, unfortunately, is typical.) Very disturbing. At least I woke up before discovering myself onstage and having no idea what I was supposed to be playing -- have had that happen in dreams before too.

**FrDNicholas** · Apr-25-2009, 9:10am

I just remembered a dream from years ago. I was supposed to audition for Garrison Keillor of a Prairie Home Companion. I didn't have my guitar, (my main instrument at that time) or my mandolin. All I had was a concertina I had just started to play. I kept thinking, "I can't play the concertina; Allistair Anderson has been on the show!" I believe I woke up before the audition.

**Dena Haselwander** · Apr-25-2009, 6:42pm

My dream involved a very old and beautiful violin I was considering purchasing: I was playing this violin in a symphony and much to my surprise, Leopold Stowkowski was the guest conductor. I was very nervous as I was sitting on the first tier, right under his nose.

The music he passed out was an Irish reel that I knew well and could play very fast. This annoyed my friends behind me. An old woman, dressed like the 1930's sat beside me. "I was his lover, you know" she said, indicating Stokowski. I frowned at her, not wanting to break concentration.

She poured olive on my bow. I tossed it into the air and another bow magically appeared in my hand. Then she proceeded to hang plastic coat hangers on the neck of my violin. I continued to play, flicking them off with my left-hand pinkie, never missing a note. Stokowski stopped conducting and shook my hand. "I never seen anyone do that before!" My friends were tremendously jealous that he had spoken to me.

I took this dream as a sign that I should purchase the violin. I did, and haven't had a single regret. Haven't encountered Stowkowski anymore, either

Dena

**vkioulaphides** · Apr-25-2009, 6:51pm

I don't know whether this will have a healing or a frightening effect on your NEXT Stokowski nightmare, Dena

but next time around you may want to incorporate some of his deliberate mispronunciations. Even though English was his native language (I think), older musicians I know, who played with him, always reported his ~artistic~ affectation of saying things like, "Oh, do place the meecrophone near the veebraphone", and other such gems of conductorial flair.

Hey, it would make dreaming more colorful...

Cheers,

Victor

**Dena Haselwander** · Apr-25-2009, 7:26pm

I thought back on the dream to remember what his voice sounded like. Deep and melodious but no noticeable accent...if anything, that curious westcoast "accentless" accent (I'm sure that would have annoyed him)...

Dena