To hide, or not to hide

[Peakbagr]

With 2 old Martins, a nice mandolin, a pending VERY nice mandolin, I usually have 1 case out and handy, sometimes 1 mandolin and 1 guitar.
My preference is to have them mostly put away when company is over. Don't want kids jumping on them or, heaven forbid, have someone be sorry they asked me to play for them.

[mandough]

Okay, I've thought this thing over...

It's much better to either have ONE mandolin out or none at all.
My reasoning is, if you have all of your mandos out, eventually, if you get a little serious with the gal, this question will come up..."Will you teach me to play?".
It may start off innocently, cute, and even endearing. You'll spend a night or two huddled around each other, teaching her chords and such. You may even get frisky after you wrap your arms around her, showing her the proper way to hold an instrument, etc.
Then the dreaded question will arise..."Can I take one of your mandolins home so I can practice that song that you taught me? You know, that Blackbenny Bosom song?"
Your eyes will stare blankly into hers for endless moments of silence. You will reply "Uhhh sure, and that's Blackberry Blossom dear."

If you choose to let her take one, then which one? You can't give her the cheapy, because that would indicate that you didn't care about her as much as she thought
(especially during those sweet moments of mandolin teaching).
You will then be forced to let her borrow one of your mid-rangers (you know, one that you don't play so much, but would never sell). Now you're stuck.

If you break up, say bye-bye to ol' #7. Even if you get it back, it will most likely be filled with cat hair. Even worse, completely dinged-up due to "Not having enough time in the day to do all of the things that I have to do AND have to put your stupid LITTLE GUITAR inside of a CAAASE!??!"

Put them away my friend, put them far far away.

[Russ(String-Alley)]

wow this is all way to much to think about, how bout' you just meet her out on the town till she knows you have MAS, then she won't think it too weird when you do head for your place, and in the waking hours of the morning ( or noonish ) she has her hair all stuck in the headstock of your "sleeper" mando

its a good problem to have......maybe
Cheers
Russ

[peterbc]

If there's one thing that women like to do, it's filling mandolins with cat hair...

Honestly though, if you have 15 mandolins... now don't get mad here, but maybe there is a problem? Granted, I would have more than the two (accoustic, electric) I have now, but 15?! I'll help you out, send a few this way!

Peter

[bjc]

Greetings,

A quick poll around my office (where I am the only male and only musician) reveals that the ladies think it'd be cool to have them out.
I know (though spoken for now) when I was single and left my electric guitars out the ladies didn't seem to mind. They either thought it was VERY cool or didn't really care.
But I agree, banjos should be hidden...something to do with that "Deliverance" Association...

[Ranger]

it's really simple....
leave out just the "Big" mando's...
Ranger

[craig]

dude, if I walked into a guy's house and he had 15 mandolins, I'd marry him on the spot.

jeesh, i've been going to school, keepin' fit and working hard and all had to do was buy 15 mandos . . . DOH!

[A9cp]

Step up to the plate, be honest. Why hide something you like.

[Rich Michaud]

Most of my dozen or so mandos are hugging the living room wall next to the piano. In front of them is my pick n glider. My harmonicas are on the piano along with Hector-my charango. The guitar is under the piano. The humdifier and dehumidifier take up one corner. Smack dab in the middle of the living room is my wife's tenor sax...I say let it all hang out..

[Lee]

I'd hope she brings something else into the relationship other than her love for my mandos. If she plays piano, and has PAS, we'll really have something to discuss. Like shopping for a conservatory with an attached house. Mmmm, what a thought...

[Laura Melden]

If there's one thing that women like to do, it's filling mandolins with cat hair...

He said that like it's a bad thing ???!!!??

[chasray]

I am all for a honesty right from the begining. To many times we try to hide ourselves or make ourselves into what we think the other person wants, all that leads to is trouble. I say have them out maybe not all in the girls face. Spread them out so it doesn't look cluttered and messy that looks like you can't take care of yourself.biased.:D

Christine has some wisdom there. You want a good impression but not a false impression.

By the way, I've been feeling kinda guilty b/c I have 4 mandos. Been thinking about selling two so that I can...guess what...buy a more expensive one! I've been married for 32 years (7 glorious years -- just kidding dear) and she doesn't mind. It's because she sees the enjoyment it gives me. And the mandos are paid for.

[JEStanek]

Wow, this thread is back form the dead, 4.7 years old!

Jamie

[chasray]

We just need to know if he's married now....

[opie wan]

This is too good to pass on.

Hiding: Pro: If you have your act together, and you're looking for a "serious" girlfriend it'll likely be a pleasant surprise that a guy could be so smart and on top of things and "also be a musician." Sort of a bonus for her later. An aside: When my wife and I met she had no idea I was a musician. She thought the fire Captain thing was pretty cool. When I broke out the Telecaster 5 years later and started getting serious as an artist she was pleasantly surprised. I never told her that I'd once received air-play as an artist... and she thought it was cool when it finally came up. Now, she's never asked me to sell an instrument.

Con: She says, you never played those things and we need the money for a house, you should sell them.


Showing: PRO: She always wanted to "do" a mandolin player? I doubt it. I guess it depends on if you meet your lady friends at "The Station" or the library. Back when I was young and owned a recording studio in Austin I asked the lady out that cut my hair. I was one of the guitarist in Austin at that time. I had her over and played a song for her that was on the radio (she didn't listen to that station... rock and roll and all). I was telling her about the guitar licks I was playing and she asked me 2 or 3 times "who's singing?" I finally answered her with "me" and she immediately got all over me. Ya just never know what a woman likes until you ask her.

Showing: Con: Also, she may have been burned by a musician in the past.... and you know... a musician IS a musician. Mandolin players AREN'T anything special. Plus, musicians tend to be drug addicts, alcoholics, and general screw ups that never amount to anything. It COULD be that being a musician is something she wants to change about you in the interest of improvement and to show you she cares for you!! Yikes.

Just don't let her make you quit playing no matter how it starts. You shouldn't take an artists tools from him/her no matter what the motivation. God didn't give you the gifts to bury.

[Jason Nagati]

Based on the answers I get for "Why do you need 15 pairs of black shoes?", a woman should understand when a man has 15 mandolins.

[man dough nollij]

Jason, that would imply logic. Not applicable in this situation.

[JEStanek]

For either party...

Jamie

[Randi Gormley]

I'm curious, too, whether the imagined ladies ever came to pass and what the final decision was ... but I'd be for keeping them in their cases and stacked around a (single) room, myself. That's what our living room looks like. The mandolins, guitars, piano/keyboards, fiddles, flutes, recorders, penny whistles, drums/bodhrans, dulcimer, banjo and percussion/xylophone are all out there, but there are so many, they kind of cover each other up. The few people who come to visit seldom step foot in the living room unless they're on a tour, or over to play music with us. I own about 4,000 books, and they're on floor-to-ceiling bookshelves throughout the house, upstairs and down. Imagine dating someone who either didn't see them, didn't comment on them or felt they were excessive -- would I want to spend time with them for more than a single date? I'd want to know straight off, frankly.

[jim simpson]

Instruments and relationships, an interesting dynamic. I had to explain recently why I wanted to get a new amplifier when I play in all acoustic bands. My wife has fortunately been very supportive of my instrument buying and my activity playing out over the many years. I like to leave a few instruments out for easy access.

[Mattg]

easier to explain 15 mandolins than 15 cats

[allenhopkins]

easier to explain 15 mandolins than 15 cats

And, honestly, the mandolins smell better...

Who did decide to dig up a thread from '04? And what's the point of getting very far into a relationship with someone, when you feel you have to hide one of the more important/interesting/relevant parts of your life from him/her?

If there's anything that gets me fulminating in a choleric fashion, other than taking old American mandolin trademarks and assigning them to Asian imports (take that, Epiphone/Washburn/Regal/Flatiron etc.!), it's the idea that playing or owning mandolins is something one has to [1] be embarrassed about [2] hide from a spouse/partner [3] get said spouse/partner's permission to continue or expand. It's not like substance abuse, cross-dressing, or compulsive gambling (they have their separate charms).

Playing the mandolin, and owning mandolins to play, is wholesome, all-American, self-fulfilling, creative, and entirely praiseworthy. And as long as one isn't taking the rent or grocery money and spending it on Tone-Gards or D'Addario J-74's, one should go ahead without embarrassment or trepidation. I sure have, and I ain't a bit ashamed of it.

[man dough nollij]

I haven't read every post in this thread, since it's so old. Someone may have already expressed this sentiment...

A new friend may not be familiar with the psychology of MAS. If we have a housefull of crazy instruments, a "normal" balanced person might not have a clue why you would possibly have more that one.

To most of us, it makes perfect sense, but it might look like a symptom of OCD or "Crazy Cat Lady Syndrome" (CCLS) to the average Joe or Jill on the street.

It might be a good idea to ease our new friends into the depth of our obsession.

Just a thought.

[swampstomper]

When I have new friends (lady or otherwise) over I have the open-back b**jo, the Lebeda A5, and the Furch D34 out where they can be seen, in my "music corner", not in their face but where they can be observed. My first test is to see if they recognize any of them (other than of course the guitar). Then the requests they make. If it's for Deliverance or Country Roads or Zorba the Greek, the party is over! One of these days (hasn't happened yet!) it will be "can you play Old Daingerfield on all of those?"

[viv]

dang, hadta wipe my eyes more than once readin these.....good stuff here .

first, cats should NEVER be bagged.....

i say leave 'em out.....i have one little beater mando and a few guitars, more than my questionable talent warrants having, and i live in a very small house. seemed like guitars were all over the living room, taking up much needed space. there's this psycho (or sane?) part of me that demands order.....so i put them in my bedroom to see if that made the psycho happy. it did, but the rest of me missed them. it looked weird --and felt weird--for them to be hiding. they're part of who i am, questionable talent and all, and they make me happy. so they're back in the living room, in plain sight but out of the line of fire known as my daughter sarah grace, and we're all fine.

i said all that to say this: if you like having them out, keep it that way. if a lady is to be your friend, she'll have to be friends with all of you.

for the record, my perspective is female.