Them: So Dave, when’s the last time someone, anyone sat on your couch?
Me: Shush, now... pfft, and they say I don’t know how to party.
Them: Nobody says that, Dave. Literally nobody.
Me: Listen, voice in my head, this is my Internet interaction. Shut the frig up or play along.
Them: social distancing is not good for you, Dave...
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