Re: Having trouble picking in public
Uhmm .... Not sure how to say this after almost 6 decades of playing (without, ya know, sounding like a total bufoon) but 4-5 years ago I went thru the same thing myself.
Brief history, that does matter: Played guitar in several rock bands back in the '60s and '70s, the only really successful one being the first, at college. Later, played periodically with friends, backyard parties, but nothing formal or "organized". Eventually, got into mandolin, then a "mostly classic rock" regular jam session for 8-10 years (both guitar & mando), then joined a mandolin orchestra. THEN the stage fright hit!! Not that I was freaked out, but I occasionally, especially toward the start of a 1 to 2-hour performance, would develop a pick shake, sometimes, especially on a solo, just missing the dang string altogether. And the first mistake breeds the 2nd, and so on... Surprised the heck outta me. Yikes!!
Eventually, I came to realize that my issue was a matter of WHO was listening to the performance, really meaning MY performance. My rock-bandmates at the same level as me? No problem. A bunch of of college students dancing while the beer flowed? No problem! A bunch of friends sitting around a campfire AND a case of beer? No problem!! A bunch of bar patrons dancing the night away while the beer REALLY flowed? No problem!!! A bunch of orchestra-mates, many of whom are classically-trained -across several instruments- and most of whom can sight-read some fairly complex music ... these people are listening to ME??? ... depending on ME to not screw up, and, as sometimes the only guitar, to set a modicum of rhythm for the rest to follow?? Me?? THEY are listening ME??? And my next mistake???? HUGE PROBLEM!!!
To keep this shorter than it might be, I came to realize that it's only music and mistakes will happen; the majority of those are heard only by the person that made them, rarely by their bandmates (who are working to drown you out anyway!), and almost never by the audience. So there are two points in that one sentence: the "almost nobody notices" defence being a subset of the "strength in numbers" defense. After enough exposure, these add up to an attitude of "familiarity breeds acceptance", and you stop worrying about what mistakes you might make, and just let the music flow. Eventually, that next mistake hardly ever happens, and when it does, you come to realize that almost nobody knows or cares. That's when the music really works!
Bottom line: The universal-around-here advice, reiterated above, to "play with others", hopefully not TOO far over your current level and in a casual situation, is probably the best thing you can do at this point. And, uhmm, I guess a beer or two couldn't hurt, either!
Last edited by EdHanrahan; Feb-28-2020 at 9:23pm.
- Ed
"Then one day we weren't as young as before
Our mistakes weren't quite so easy to undo
But by all those roads, my friend, we've travelled down
I'm a better man for just the knowin' of you."
- Ian Tyson
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