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Thread: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

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    Default Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    I am relatively new to playing mandolin, but have noticed some performance anxiety in the form of shakiness in the hands and bodily tightness when playing with others, either a teacher or a friend. It definitely interferes with my playing, but eventually will begin to subside somewhat. This is not an uncommon theme in my life, so not super surprised by it.

    I think I subconsciously look at playing in front of a teacher or a more experienced friend as a "mini performance" as in I "should" have such and such down. Of course, this zaps some of the fun and creativity out of it.

    Anybody else relate to this? If so, have you found anything that helps?

    Thanks!

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    two t's and one hyphen fatt-dad's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    part of the hobby - in the manner of public speaking.

    My advice? Remember to breath.

    f-d
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    Mediocre but OK with that Paul Busman's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    I get that too sometimes. I'll be playing right along at an Irish session, but when it's my turn to start a tune and I choose one that I know really well, I'll fumble with getting it started. Once everyone else joins in, I'm fine.
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    formerly Philphool Phil Goodson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    At least in the informal jam situation, I just tell myself that all the players around me don't really care what I'm doing (as long as I keep in time and don't mess up their playing) and that they are thinking more about what they are playing and what they'll do when their break comes.

    Bottom line: each individual is thinking "this is all about me!"

    Whether any of that is actually true or not, it still helps me to think that way.

    (Besides, I figure that they think I'm old and they don't expect much of me anyway. )
    Phil

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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    I think it helps to know it’s a widely shared thing. Beyond that, I find that the more I do it the better it is; the more I’m familiar with the tune the better it is (i.e. at the jam, play a tune you’ve been playing for a while, not the one you’ve just gotten down—that recently learned tune will desert you).

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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    What you are experiencing is typical of 'fairly new' players . . . given patience, time and more exposure to playing with others, you will be fine. In the meantime, maybe try to find one of two people that you are VERY comfortable to play with, or playing front of - and work slowly from there.

    Keep up the good work.

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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    One of the specific things to focus on, besides having some tunes down cold, is to play with backing tracks or tune MP3s from different bands/sources and practice "catching up" when you make a mistake, jumping ahead in the melody or backup part to where everybody else is.

    not easy but that takes a lot of tension off, knowing you won't be the sore thumb.
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Sounds more or less like nerves to me. Nerves are usually caused in any walk of life by lack of knowledge or lack of preparation. Even if you have done something well in the past, if you haven't done it for a while, then there is a certain nervousness that you are not fully prepared to do whatever it is and if someone is listening to you then subconsciously you'll be a little nervous. This can lead to sticky hands etc. If you have not 'rehearsed it fully' then your mind knows this.

    Think if you were going for a job interview. If you are totally clued up and 'know your stuff' you won't be anything like as nervous as if you go not having properly prepared, even if you have the knowledge.

    Preparation is everything so if you are in a session and someone plays a tune you don't know, don't get caught up in trying to play it wrong. Just have a good listen and then learn it at home.

    Good luck and remember that your teacher was once in the same position.

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  17. #9
    but that's just me Bertram Henze's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Quote Originally Posted by Hoogus View Post
    I think I subconsciously look at playing in front of a teacher or a more experienced friend as a "mini performance" as in I "should" have such and such down.
    Subconsciously? I never had the slightest doubt that playing in front of others is performance alright, and it does not matter if it's one teacher or a stadium full of fans. Enter Adrenaline.

    Adrenaline is your friend, accept it and it will help you. The Situation is the ultimate proof if you "have it down" or not. Only after that is when fun and creativity really begins.

    The good news is it can be practised, alone. Get a video camera (anything cheap will do, a mobile phone is fine). The moment you push that recording button and start to play you'll feel the rush. Watch the video afterwards - no, that's not optional, you must watch it to create the intimidation of being watched by the worst possible critic (i.e. your own future self) while you play. Then do it again and again...
    Only when you gain the ability to forgive yourself and watch yourself and not scream with embarrassment, then you're ready to play in front of others, because then it will be a piece of cake.
    the world is better off without bad ideas, good ideas are better off without the world

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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    As you continue to play and evolve your style it'll go away for sure like a bad habit! The more ya play in front of people or with others all the better!

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    Registered User Steve Sorensen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Heck yeah! Got to get into a regular jam and just try to swim. Eventually you'll just go with the flow.

    Steve
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    Doc Ivory Doc Ivory's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Performance anxiety hits even the pros.
    Years ago I had a hard time playing in front of my teacher it hot so bad for me.

    Solution?
    Know some tunes very well and if you can, have a "mentor" in the group who can encourage you and be a safe friend when you lose your place.

    It really is just a matter of doing it over and over again.

    I predict once you gave your first solo go right , a lot of the anxiety will fade.
    Just go with the flow.
    We've all been there.
    Doc Ivory
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    I agree all newbies go thru this to a certain extent. I don't agree that it will just go away. You must make it go away by playing in front of people and other mandolin players until you are comfortable with what you know. I figured out a long time ago if I was playing to a crowd that had a beginner mandolin player in it or if I was playing to a crowd that had Doyle Lawson and Ricky Scaggs in it, I still had the same ability, I'm still the same mandolin player.

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  27. #14

    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    You don't have to be new at this to experience performance anxiety, but really, what do you have to be anxious about? Realize this is an internal not external issue. You get judged by others in every aspect of your life.npeople are evaluating you on your looks the moment you meet them. Does it stop you from going out? Unfortunately for some people it does.

    So you really are your own worst enemy when it comes down to it. If you have a teacher, it should be the teacher who has to worry about your judgement. It is their job to get you to to where you'd like to be.

    So how to get over it? The best possible venue for this is an open mic. Will it be hard? What worthwhile thing isn't? You don't have to be good, whatever that means, to get in front of folks. They will all have been there before, and just doing it will in there minds put you ahead of the game. If you want to do this with a friend the first few times, that is ok. But what matters is you doing it. You will suck, ok? Weather you do or don't, that is how you will feel. Guess what? Do it again,then again, then again. Some people never really get comfortable, but do it anyway. After making the scene for a while,you realize you are playing for friends who are pulling for you, enjoying watching you progress.

    This week three young men made their first performance ever at an open mic. They were on last and were pretty good. You could tell they were struggling to get through three songs,finished with a feeling of relief, and then one of the very accomplished regulars asked them to play another song, then another. That is the kind of support you can expect.

    I'm going to play my new mandolin I built next week. I'm not great at it, but that isn't the point. Three chord old timey is fine.

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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Hoogus, I think all of us show signs of nerves depending on the playing situation. Being prepared helps but isn't a cure all. One time I tried to play a tune, in front of a class, with Roland White that I had played hundred of times. I completely missed the strings with the pick on the first line. He looked at me and said "relax".
    My son is a much better player than I am. When I asked him for advice to improve my playing his answer was "breath". I would say accepting and being aware of physical tension is a good start. Try to relax the area where you feel tension. Usually that is shoulders and hands. This might be something you have to work at. Don't assume it will away completely with time. I have been playing for any years and have done probably over a thousand gigs. I still feel tight when playing a festival or with really good musicians.
    I often remind myself of what a fiddle playing good friend of mind once said."Hey we are musicians, not surgeons. If we make a mistake no one dies".

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    Oval holes are cool David Lewis's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    All really good advice. What works for me: I've had crippling stage fright in periods of my life -crippling. ONe gig I forgot how to play mandolin. I was looking down at teh neck wondering where to put my fingers. I'd been playing for eight years then.

    the key for me (and possibly you) is to force yourself to relax. Breathe as Fatt DAd said. Relax your shoulders. Look up and smile. If you look at movie actors - look at how relaxed they are, even though, if they're in a big movie that their performance is dependent on the movie making a profit, they make it seem effortless. That's what you're after. If you can't relax, fake it till you make it. Get yourself used to acting relaxed, adn guess what happens?

    Hope this helps, and good luck.
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  33. #17
    F5G & MD305 Astro's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    If you just keep doing it, you'll eventually get tired of being nervous.
    No matter where I go, there I am...Unless I'm running a little late.

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    Registered User Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Same thing used to happen to me every the time. All good advice above. Want more?

    I solved it by having someone else do my playing for me. For reasons that don't matter here, I invented "Neon" Leon Fullerton, a tall, rangy, slow-moving, hard-drinking, cactus-chewing, sweet-talking, road-rambling guit-picking cowpoke named "Neon" Leon Fullerton to do all my singing and playing for me, and I just go along for the ride. (You can read all about him at www.thefullertons.net.)

    Leon is basically everything I'm not. Which means I can leave myself behind when I play for people and just enjoy the show.

    The funny thing is, when I mentioned that at another forum, five other performers chimed in to say that they send alter-egos on stage, too. So I know I'm not the only one.

    Worth a try?

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  37. #19
    but that's just me Bertram Henze's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Quote Originally Posted by Charlie Bernstein View Post
    Leon is basically everything I'm not. Which means I can leave myself behind when I play for people and just enjoy the show.
    It worked for many famous actors, including presidents.
    The only thing that would make me nervous: what if I want to return to myself after the show and I am no longer there?
    the world is better off without bad ideas, good ideas are better off without the world

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  39. #20
    Mandol'Aisne Daniel Nestlerode's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    It happens to everyone at some point.

    Mostly I don't get anxiety... But a few years ago I was in a Bluegrass playing a small festival at which Special Consensus were headlining. Lovely guys Special C, very much worth your time and energy. At the end of the night they had us join them on stage for a song and gave us all breaks. When it came my turn, I froze. Hands suddenly encased in invisible concrete, brain locked up, mouth hanging open I could not muster a decent break to save my life.

    The moment passed very slowly, but it passed. And I'm alive to tell the story.

    I have since decided that for me anxiety stems from feeling unprepared. So I practice a lot. I try to make sure I know what to do and how to do it before it comes time to do it on stage. This is easier when I pick the songs and tunes.

    I'm no longer in that band for entirely different reasons. (didn't get along well with the banjo player, who was running the band) So I'm in better control of things. And the anxiety has not returned.

    Daniel

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  41. #21

    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Being a gemini, that HAS happened to me.......
    (The dual personality thing).lol

    As for nerves, i agree, its internal.
    Relentless consistent practice helps a lot. To an extent.

    Tension can really mess me up. It is strictly mental.

    For me, i simply jump in, and try to abandon my ego, and have fun. The more i do it, the easier it is.
    Its ok to simply chord along, or, take a break and listen.
    There will always be those better and worse than you.

    you simply have to do it.


    No one dies. I like this!

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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Quote Originally Posted by stevedenver View Post
    No one dies. I like this!
    I have died on stage many times - but not to the physical extent . . . although there have been many times that I have wanted to crawl into a 6-foot hole and never come out again - and my audience probably wished the same thing!

  43. #23
    Mediocre but OK with that Paul Busman's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    You might try impromptu playing outdoors in public in a park or somewhere similar. You'd get used to playing in front of other people, but they probably won't be mandolin players,so you're already a LOT better player than they are. I've done this often and people invariable enjoy being surprised by live music. You could use the opportunity to proselytize for our little instrument. Heck, leave your case open with some change in it and you might even make a few bucks!
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  45. #24
    Registered User mreidsma's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Quote Originally Posted by Charlie Bernstein View Post
    I solved it by having someone else do my playing for me. For reasons that don't matter here, I invented "Neon" Leon Fullerton, a tall, rangy, slow-moving, hard-drinking, cactus-chewing, sweet-talking, road-rambling guit-picking cowpoke named "Neon" Leon Fullerton to do all my singing and playing for me, and I just go along for the ride.
    I love this, and especially this: (from the website)

    Quote Originally Posted by Charlie Bernstein View Post
    His last known address was a Detroit rehab facility, from which, in 2003, he issued himself a midnight discharge via the agency of a second story window, a 28-foot aluminum Werner extension ladder, and a nurse’s aide with a soft spot for rickety coots practiced in the art of spinning a tragic yarn.

  46. #25

    Default Re: Mando "performance anxiety" when playing with others?

    Yes, there comes a time when you have humiliated yourself so deeply and for so many years in front of so many people that you finally conquer this feeling.

    At least, that's what I've heard.

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