LeosWood Armrests...PLEASE READ

[LeosWood]

Hi all, my name is Leo.

Even though I've been avoiding this for quite some time, I figure its about time I start posting here on the Cafe. So here goes nothin'.

The short version of this long post is the following:

If you ordered an armrest from me in the past and didn't receive it, or aren't happy with it, let me know and I will do my best to make things right. Or if you just want to drop in and tell me to p*** off, thats cool, too.

Either post to this thread or send me a message and I will work things out with you.

I stand by my work and also realize I've dropped the ball on numerous occasions for far too many people. I apologize profusely for my screw ups and neglect, and would like more than anything to tie up the loose ends that haven't already been taken care of. I've been trying my best to get back on my feet and keep things moving forward.


______________________________


As some of you may know, I make armrests along with an assortment of tools and other items under the name "LeosWood." As some of you may also know, at certain times in the last couple of years, my customer service and order completion times have been terrible to the point of embarrassment.

Life has dealt me blow after blow since May of 2015. It seemed like every few months someone important to me was either dead or dying. I lost over a dozen family members and friends to illness, suicide, or murder in about 2 years time. Every time I started to get things together and catch up with my armrest orders, things fell apart again.

Among the s***storm of trauma over the past few years, losing my mom to cancer and the murder of my pregnant fiance were the biggest blows. Its impossible to express in words how these events effected me. My mom was my rock and my best friend for first 27 years of my life, losing her left a giant gaping hole. However, I had some warning and a short period of time where we were able to say goodbye to each other.

When I lost my fiancé in such a gruesome way, it was completely unexpected and in many ways more difficult to handle with than losing my mom. I didn't even know she was pregnant until months after she was killed, when it was brought up while her father was on trial for her murder this past October. Finding out in that way completely devastated me. For a long time I thought I'd never recover.

Every time I entered a hospital setting I started having breakdowns and flashbacks to how my fiancé looked for the 10 hours she stayed alive after being shot 3 times in the head. This eventually led to me losing my career as an RN, since I could no longer handle being on the floor working as a nurse, let alone setting foot in a hospital. Woodwork was my only peace in life and it kept me going/alive.

Everybody deals with death/loss in different ways, and for me it led to periods of total shutdown and inability to deal with my obligations or any stressful situation, including just simply messaging my buyers. So much loss in such a short period of time put life itself in a whole different perspective for me. There were extended periods where I slowed down my work with wood and let many orders fall behind. My communication with customers was either slow or nonexistent during these periods, to the point where I am ashamed when I think about it now. Especially considering that woodwork is the only thing that kept food on my table since losing my career as a nurse.

I tried my best to keep it together but inevitably things fell apart. Sometimes for extended periods of time. I kept saying to myself, "I'll clear things up for everyone when I can think straight again." At this point I realize that time may never come, so I just have to keep moving forward and straighten things out as best I can.

Most all of my customers were supportive and understanding, and a few couldn't wrap their heads around what I was going through. Which is to be expected. Woodwork was one of the only things that kept me going throughout all of this along with the kind words from people who were nice enough to purchase my work and bear with me through the struggles I was dealing with.

So, as I said in the beginning of this post, if I messed things up for you I would like the opportunity to make it right. None of this is meant as an excuse, however, it IS meant to clarify where my head has been at and my current status. I'm not a 'crook' or a 'thief' or a 'scam artist' or an 'idiot' as I've been called on a few occasions by disappointed customers.

Thanks for taking the time to read through all this nonsense. I'm looking forward to posting here more often after I get everything taken care of.

[James Miller]

Sir, I know all too well how death can mess one up. Was both my parent's caregiver. We lost the house to foreclosure as Father's AARP life insurance refused to pay out (he was too old?!?), and was forced to move from a 4 bedroom 2 shed to a 1 bedroom trailer half-shed.
Mom's heart started to go bad, and her sister was no help riling mom up - which ended being one time too many.

It was hell when my father died. Half my life ripped from my soul. Then when mom passed I was beyond devastated. Took me nearly a year to find two part time jobs, and got help from The Salvation Army in the form of temporary employment as a bell ringer - and think I cried the entire season. Life was not.

The didgeridoo playing helped me pull through it though; expressing music through emotion. It’s been 3 years since she passed. I have photos of them both hanging on a cork board outside my bedroom.

If wasn't for my church family & the fellowship outings ... and am trying to restart life in the mid-50's. Barely make enough to get by - neither job cares. But I will NOT give in!

Got a recumbent trike that I was looking at for nearly 10 years; hoping it will of help me lose the weight I gained. Was 265#, 48” waist before being their care giver – 58” nearly 400# after. Riding helps, but need an entire lifestyle change that I cannot afford - so have to accept with what I have & go from there.
Am finding the mandolin helps me to express myself, and hope someday I can get a lucky break and break free.

My sincerest condolences on your closer personal losses. Do not give in, and do not second guess yourself. Life is not easy, surviving sucks … there is light at the end of the tunnel! Music helps LOTS.

[Bertram Henze]

And there I thought the worst crimes we hear about here are instrument theft and copyright infringement.

Apparently, you are on your way climbing out of the stupor of absurdity that settles on us like volcanic ash at times like these. Keep going, and the weight will subside. Take the opportunity to come out a stronger man than you went in, because that is the one benefit you deserve.

[LeosWood]

Sir, I know all too well how death can mess one up. Was both my parent's caregiver. We lost the house to foreclosure as Father's AARP life insurance refused to pay out (he was too old?!?), and was forced to move from a 4 bedroom 2 shed to a 1 bedroom trailer half-shed.
Mom's heart started to go bad, and her sister was no help riling mom up - which ended being one time too many.

It was hell when my father died. Half my life ripped from my soul. Then when mom passed I was beyond devastated. Took me nearly a year to find two part time jobs, and got help from The Salvation Army in the form of temporary employment as a bell ringer - and think I cried the entire season. Life was not.

The didgeridoo playing helped me pull through it though; expressing music through emotion. It’s been 3 years since she passed. I have photos of them both hanging on a cork board outside my bedroom.

If wasn't for my church family & the fellowship outings ... and am trying to restart life in the mid-50's. Barely make enough to get by - neither job cares. But I will NOT give in!

Got a recumbent trike that I was looking at for nearly 10 years; hoping it will of help me lose the weight I gained. Was 265#, 48” waist before being their care giver – 58” nearly 400# after. Riding helps, but need an entire lifestyle change that I cannot afford - so have to accept with what I have & go from there.
Am finding the mandolin helps me to express myself, and hope someday I can get a lucky break and break free.

My sincerest condolences on your closer personal losses. Do not give in, and do not second guess yourself. Life is not easy, surviving sucks … there is light at the end of the tunnel! Music helps LOTS.

Not giving in, and not second guessing myself...those are the 2 most difficult things I've had to deal with. Both of which seemed near impossible many times. And I'm sure those feelings won't ever completely go away as much as I'd like for that to happen.

I truly appreciate you taking the time to respond and give your experiences with loss. The move from a large multi bedroom house to a shed is very familiar to me now. Something I never thought I'd do, but I kept telling myself, "well, at least you're not completely homeless yet."

I've never been a very religious person throughout my life, but since all this I've found a fair amount of peace with it, makes it feel like a still have a family in some capacity after losing so many.

Riding my bike, playing music, my dog, and most importantly woodwork...those are the only reasons I'm still here today. Losing my mom made it feel like my whole purpose on this planet was gone.

On a side note, that Bloodwood didgeridoo sounds pretty slick. I'd love to see photos of it.

[LeosWood]

And there I thought the worst crimes we hear about here are instrument theft and copyright infringement.

Apparently, you are on your way climbing out of the stupor of absurdity that settles on us like volcanic ash at times like these. Keep going, and the weight will subside. Take the opportunity to come out a stronger man than you went in, because that is the one benefit you deserve.

If only those were the worst of the crimes! I've had a few instruments stolen from me, and at this point I'd be more than willing to lose the rest to thieves just to avoid going through any more loss of loved ones. Although at this point there aren't many left to lose unfortunately.

I can only hope and work towards being a better, stronger, person than I was when this all started. I remember the moment when I first knew there was no question that my mom only had a few weeks to live. It hit me like a ton of bricks sitting in my car outside the hospital where she was. I remember vividly thinking to myself that I had to remember what the day before her terminal diagnosis felt like...because I knew then and there that that was going to be the last time I ever felt that way again. Or at least for a very long time. The weight of every loss comes and goes, but there are some days/weeks where I just can't seem to shake it. Time supposedly heals all wounds, but I have a feeling that in cases like this, time just makes the pain less sharp and more bearable.

[B381]

I feel for your loss.

I got your email and replied about 2 weeks ago....

[JFDilmando]

Leo, I am so very pleased for you that you have recovered to this point.... Where you find yourself presently.... able to gather yourself to the point of communicating to your customers, and offering to make things right with them after this terrible time, is a tremendous step.

If in long ago posts. I used the word "scam", it was to verbalize the reality of the situation, not the intent. We all understand the situation, and can certainly understand that you were experiencing something that most of us have never gone through....

I placed an order long ago, in the bad times for you.... I have no interest in you "making good" on that order... I treat it as an investment in you, and your future. I wish you the best, in your recovery, and in general for the days and years going forward. the next time I will need an armrest for one of my instruments, you will be the first person I contact.

[almeriastrings]

Had no business dealing with you - but what you say resonates, and is true. This kind of experience (and yours was extreme) can tear you apart, and certainly, "keeping your eye on the ball" during and afterwards is often impossible. Healing from things like that can take a very long time indeed. The fact that you are addressing this, however, speaks well of you. I wish you continued progress and all the best for the future.

[OneChordTrick]

My commiserations to you. Sounds like you’re turning a corner and I wish you every success, there’s some beautiful work on your site! I think I may have just depleted your stock, looking forward to receiving it.

[Bertram Henze]

Time supposedly heals all wounds, but I have a feeling that in cases like this, time just makes the pain less sharp and more bearable.

Healing leaves a scar, and like war veterans we wear our scars for a long time.

[Ranger Bob]

I recently bought one of Leo's arm rests. I have had other arm rests by well known and established makers. Leo's equals or exceeds them in craftsmanship and utility. I am VERY happy with mine. It is a beautiful padauk with nickel Hill hardware.

[ccravens]

Thoughts and prayers for you Leo.

[LeosWood]

Leo, I am so very pleased for you that you have recovered to this point.... Where you find yourself presently.... able to gather yourself to the point of communicating to your customers, and offering to make things right with them after this terrible time, is a tremendous step.

If in long ago posts. I used the word "scam", it was to verbalize the reality of the situation, not the intent. We all understand the situation, and can certainly understand that you were experiencing something that most of us have never gone through....

I placed an order long ago, in the bad times for you.... I have no interest in you "making good" on that order... I treat it as an investment in you, and your future. I wish you the best, in your recovery, and in general for the days and years going forward. the next time I will need an armrest for one of my instruments, you will be the first person I contact.

Thank you, John. Its definitely been a tough time getting to this point, I've been avoiding talking about any of it in depth, as it brought up a lot of emotion for me. Still does, but I am better able to handle things now, realizing I have to move forward more with every day, rather than staying frozen in the past. I've been meaning to start posting here for years at this point, but each time I sat down to do so, I'd freeze up and anxiety would take over, over something as simple as posting to a forum. I guess it just takes time...and therapy, rather than just ignoring that I had some issues to work through.

If you ever do need another armrest, let me know and I'll send whatever you need out on the house. Or, more accurately, on the 'truck'...as I've currently moved my shop and living quarters into a box truck!

[LeosWood]

Had no business dealing with you - but what you say resonates, and is true. This kind of experience (and yours was extreme) can tear you apart, and certainly, "keeping your eye on the ball" during and afterwards is often impossible. Healing from things like that can take a very long time indeed. The fact that you are addressing this, however, speaks well of you. I wish you continued progress and all the best for the future.

I appreciate the well wishes! And I can't agree more with what you said. Even when I felt like I was keeping things together and moving forward, often times I was tricking myself into thinking I could just snap out of it. My sense of reality was absolutely altered during the thick of it. And often times, things were so unbelievable that even my own circle of friends had a hard time believing what I would tell them.

My commiserations to you. Sounds like you’re turning a corner and I wish you every success, there’s some beautiful work on your site! I think I may have just depleted your stock, looking forward to receiving it.

I really need to do some work to my website here very soon. I haven't spent much time with that in the last few months since I've been focusing on my Etsy store and keeping that together. I look forward to getting things mailed out to you, and I hope you enjoy my work!

Healing leaves a scar, and like war veterans we wear our scars for a long time.

Been slowly learning that that is just how things are involving events like this. I found myself hanging around combat veterans more and more over the last couple of years, looking for pointers from those who successfully deal with their own wounds. Just took quite a while for the wounds to stop festering and the scars to form.

I recently bought one of Leo's arm rests. I have had other arm rests by well known and established makers. Leo's equals or exceeds them in craftsmanship and utility. I am VERY happy with mine. It is a beautiful padauk with nickel Hill hardware.

I'm absolutely thrilled to read this, so glad its working out well for you!

Thoughts and prayers for you Leo.

Tremendous thanks, Chris. Truly.

[gtani7]

Well, I don't have a horse in the race but I will say that you can probably use your woodworking skills to get work making cabinets, furniture, other things and make a very decent living doing that. Obviously, it's hard work.

The other thing is that i've emailed a few armrest makers about making an ergonomic banjo armrest and nobody wanted to spend the time but I think you could sell a decent number. All i'm talking about is a wood top with soft rounded edges, maybe contoured, on top of the usual 2 bracket banjo attachment that nobody likes. The thing is that you can just hook it on 1 bracket fast and easy and it holds just fine and will fit any banjo that way.

[LeosWood]

Well, I don't have a horse in the race but I will say that you can probably use your woodworking skills to get work making cabinets, furniture, other things and make a very decent living doing that. Obviously, it's hard work.

The other thing is that i've emailed a few armrest makers about making an ergonomic banjo armrest and nobody wanted to spend the time but I think you could sell a decent number. All i'm talking about is a wood top with soft rounded edges, maybe contoured, on top of the usual 2 bracket banjo attachment that nobody likes. The thing is that you can just hook it on 1 bracket fast and easy and it holds just fine and will fit any banjo that way.

Most definitely! I've had a bit of luck with making tools for other woodworkers as well. Mostly handled tools like knives, awls, and burnishers. But more recently I've been making more and more hand planes, which I really enjoy.

As far as banjo rests go...I'd be willing to take a shot at some. Just need a place to source the brackets. Do you have a photo of how you prefer to have it attached?

[Br1ck]

I've delt with a one man used audio and repair business over the years. One day he just didn't show up for two months. People were outraged the could get no response or get their property.

Turned out he was getting an unplanned foot long piece of steel in his back, but no one knew. He finally got a friend to help him out and the guy was having to deal with pissed off people all day. No communication was a big problem but really no ones fault.

Good for you having the strength to explain.

[RustyMutt]

Leo, you've been nothing but a champ for me. You made me an African Blackwood armrest and the difference in the sound of my mando is spectacular. That thing RINGS, baby.
Thanks for sharing and for your good work. It is much appreciated.

[Steve Ostrander]

Wow. That's a lot to deal with. I can't even imagine. That took a lot of guts just to post. I hope you are swimming to the surface now and can find some peace and happiness in your work.

[SGraham]

Hi Leo,
I understand your withdrawing after so much loss. I lost my wife Suzie to Huntington's Disease in October after being married for 35 years. I just wanted to say that your candor and openness about what grief has done to you is impressive. I admire a man who can put it out there like that. It's encouraging to see; it looks like integrity.