Mandolin Bros Catalog Descriptions by Stan

[mandoglobal]

In another post, some of our fellow Cafe members introduced me to the captivating prose used by the late Stan Jay of the once great Mandolin Brothers. It seems Stan had a nearly mystical ability to describe the finer qualities of mandolins of all types, so I am following some advice and starting a new thread specifically dealing with this subject. If anyone has some of Stans writing they can share, please do so. Thank you!!

Example:
http://mandoweb.com/Instruments/Ovat...olin-2009/2200

[Johnny60]

Yeah, that's a great description. Loved the bit about Mr and Ms Tibia and Fibia and all the other low joints!

[Hendrik Ahrend]

Stan's prose was brilliant, indeed. It almost made you forget it was advertising.

[Eric F.]

"This mandolin, with its signature label and original hard shell case, makes every ear in the room in which it is played feel as if it has quietly and unexpectedly passed away and made the final hegira to ear heaven. If your trust fund has done well through this recession, this smiling schnauzer can be your own private flood tide of personal satisfaction."

https://web.archive.org/web/20101218...924)/2101.aspx

[MikeEdgerton]

Some pages I found on the web. I wish I'd hung onto those catalogs.

[taptuned]

I checked my Bookcase Mike and I have 4 Vintage News. The earliest is 1992. I'm not certain but I believe thats the year I ordered My F5 Flatiron. Oh...the memories

[MikeEdgerton]

Do you have the ability to scan them?

[mandoglobal]

You might even be able to take some semi close pics with your phone and post that. Can't wait to see more!

[bratsche]

"In the Gibson hierarchy of mandolin models the A-Jr. has, since its inception in 1919, suffered the indignity of being the lowest in the league, the most servile salmon still in service, the ne’er-do-well in the maple and spruce pile. This one was made during the window of opportunity in which the headstock was inverted, that is - it gets skinnier as it heads upward toward the heavens. It was also made in the last full year in which the A-Jr. was offered. Because it is a lowest caste member of the family it did not get the adjustable truss rod that its orificed sisters, the common A-, A-1, A-2, A-3 and A-4, received. Then, to add gin, salt to make it gingery, it was bestowed with a simple, nickel-plated slide-down scalloped tailpiece cover (which is elegant and genuinely pretty)."

Hilarious - I remember reading these ads for free entertainment on the web. Thanks for the memories!

bratsche

[Seter]

So basically the J. Peterman of instrument catalogs? Perhaps a Wodehouse fan?

[Hendrik Ahrend]

Check out the three different descriptions of Loar-signed mandola H5 #76966 (from the Mandolin Archive):

F5 Jornal: No virzi

Frank Ford: - Brown Sunburst. No Loar Label, order number stamped where signature label may have been removed. Refinished and reworked by Gibson 1930s

Mandolin Bros: This, the illustrious also voice of the mandolin family, tuned CGDA, has a typical F-model hairline crack on the bass body area near the scroll, and it is presently missing its tailpiece cover. This lovely and venerated 15� wide, nominally 16� scale length big mama-dola shows normal light signs of playing time, including fewer than typical dings and insignificant scratches and finish checking. Purists will note that one original screw is missing from the treble tuner but we prefer to think this an omen. Did you know that only 17 H-5 Loar period mandolas are listed in the F-5 Journal? In the area inside the treble f-hole where you would normally see the signed and dated Lloyd Loar label is just a sticky, dried mess (Harriet! What did you do with that label!!?) and the stamped factory order number #11058, which is not something you normally see in a Lloyd Loar instrument unless you’re into mutilating your signed label (yeah, right). Or perhaps Lord Lear, while walking the manufacturing positions, came upon this mandola, examined it and said “Zut alors! I can’t approve these tone bars! My gold plated tweezers, now! I’m stripping it of its label! Let this be a lesson!� It is our belief that the mandolin went back to the factory in the early ‘30s for refinishing and new tuners. The tuners are early ‘30s style with the engraved floral pattern on the back bearing actual pearl buttons with the rusty old screw at the end of each button. The pickguard bears its “’09� patent stamp, the pickguard clamp is the screw-in side-mount type, and the ebony bridge base displays its Jan. ’21 stamp. The sound of this mandola is sweeter than wine, deliciously dark and irrepressibly euphonic

[colorado_al]

irrepressibly euphonic

I like it!

[allenhopkins]

Just as the garden party was gettin' goin', the skunk showed up...

While I appreciated Stan Jay's way with words, I sometimes wearied of the long string of superlatives. Definitely a gifted writer, but I kept reminding myself that he was trying to sell me the instrument in question, and that every instrument that passed through his showroom couldn't be amazing, unique, fascinating, historic, melodious, unparalleled, etc., etc. There were undoubtedly some that were just OK, and -- I hate to think it -- others that weren't all that great, eh?

Truly encyclopedic knowledge of stringed instruments, a talent at stringing together sometimes-florid descriptors, and an admirable gift for finding memorable, hilarious, and unexpected analogies, and hypothetical historical scenarios. And yet, it's advertising copy, replete with puffery, right?

So, I miss Stan and his catalog and website "mini-essays," but in the end I might "cleanse the palate" with the more terse and evaluative descriptions at Elderly, Carter Vintage or Gruhn. "This mandolin is in good playable shape, considering its age," e.g.

Just my snarky 2¢.

[bratsche]

Oddly enough, I always found Stan's prose to be somewhat reminiscent of that featured in the American Science & Surplus catalogs I remember getting as a kid. (Just checked, and they're still around!) I guess something can be said for needing creative descriptions to sell some of the junk they get to peddle. Instruments, on the other hand.......?? But for those of us who just went to read and not buy, it certainly was entertaining!

bratsche

[Marcus CA]

Truly encyclopedic knowledge of stringed instruments, a talent at stringing together sometimes-florid descriptors, and an admirable gift for finding memorable, hilarious, and unexpected analogies, and hypothetical historical scenarios. And yet, it's advertising copy, replete with puffery, right?

So, I miss Stan and his catalog and website "mini-essays," but in the end I might "cleanse the palate" with the more terse and evaluative descriptions at Elderly, Carter Vintage or Gruhn. "This mandolin is in good playable shape, considering its age,"

Stan's way with words was no different than most music stores' way with photos. The goal was for the musician (i.e., potential customer) to linger over them for a long time in order to strengthen desire for that instrument. So, with no intent or desire to purchase anything, I'd go to the other stores' websites to enjoy the pictures and to Mandolin Brothers' website to enjoy the words.

[taptuned]

Here's a description from Stan taken from his 1992 Vintage News catalog for a 1907 3-Point F-4 Gibson Mandolin.

Blonde, vg+ with original carrying device. We have never seen one quite the same as this. It is exquisitely designed,

with many unexpected delicate cosmetic touches. The abalone butterfly inlaid into tortoise shell pick guard is one such

,the fancy peghead inlay, the beauty of the one piece (!) flame maple back, the unexspected beauty of its clear, radiant

tone. If ever there were a mandolin to take your mind instantly back to the sylvan, bucolic simplicity of the earlier time

the Willoughby stop on the commuter train, where children roll hoops, men wear straw hats, and the brass band up on the

latticework-bordered gazebo plays every afternoon

[stevedenver]

Just as the garden party was gettin' goin', the skunk showed up...

While I appreciated Stan Jay's way with words, I sometimes wearied of the long string of superlatives. Definitely a gifted writer, but I kept reminding myself that he was trying to sell me the instrument in question, and that every instrument that passed through his showroom couldn't be amazing, unique, fascinating, historic, melodious, unparalleled, etc., etc. There were undoubtedly some that were just OK, and -- I hate to think it -- others that weren't all that great, eh?

Truly encyclopedic knowledge of stringed instruments, a talent at stringing together sometimes-florid descriptors, and an admirable gift for finding memorable, hilarious, and unexpected analogies, and hypothetical historical scenarios. And yet, it's advertising copy, replete with puffery, right?

So, I miss Stan and his catalog and website "mini-essays," but in the end I might "cleanse the palate" with the more terse and evaluative descriptions at Elderly, Carter Vintage or Gruhn. "This mandolin is in good playable shape, considering its age," e.g.

Just my snarky 2¢.

Well, i know negative posts are often unpopular, but here goes my pov.

As one who tried to deal with mando bros, i often was seeking to purchase , from time to time , over decades.

But..............stan believed his stuff, or, was seemingly looking for a cork sniffing pigeon. A nieman marcus mind set, i think, for used instruments. Way above market, typically.

I too, wearied of stans verbose descriptions.
I loved it the first time, but like ice cream, i dont want it 24/7.

I agree, reminds me of j peterman, BUT, way higher priced, and, less a fantasy story and simple marketers drivel.

So, for me, the prosiac indulgence was less ineresting and less tolerable. I failed to linger, indeed.

And, fwiw, the hyperbole actually put me off, like some sideshow barker. Perhaps, the lack of sincerity. Other sellers of reknown rarely editorialize, so if they mentioned an opinion as to sound, it carried weight, for me.

Otoh, perhaps im a literary philistine. I dont think of my gear as fine wine, euphonic, colored like the golden apples of ther sun...........

[Timbofood]

In today's world we have become much more "immediate gratification" driven and actually reading a loquacious description in Stans style is too much to absorb. We now want "nice condition, player not, collector quality" not anything the least bit romantic. Cold, clinical, all but sterile is the direction preferred by the electronically driven marketplace now.
How sad, I've been lucky, née, privileged to work with people who loved detail and intricacies of language. Call me pedantic if you will, but, well written language is a joy to read, Stans words were written to be read aloud, and enjoyed for their meter and lyrical qualities.
Well, now I'm just rambling but Allen, think of how his description of a "Schmergel Devastator" might read!

[Jeff Mando]

I liked reading Stan's descriptions and sure, I knew he was selling something, but it kinda went beyond that. Sure, his prices were high, even by Gruhn standards, but I wasn't really a buyer back then anyway -- I was still finding plenty of stuff at flea markets, antique stores, etc. -- at the "people's" prices. But, like looking at a Rolls Royce catalog, it was still enjoyable even though I wasn't in the market.

I tried to find it and couldn't locate it, but about 25 years ago, before all the "reissues" appeared, Mandolin Brothers had located a 50's Gretsch White Penguin, of which only about 3 were known to exist -- appointed like a White Falcon, but in a "Les Paul" size body style. (Duo Jet, actually) Anyway, back when a good pre-CBS strat would cost you $5K, Stan was asking $75K for this Gretsch -- fair enough -- due to the rarity......BUT then he goes into great detail poetically describing the guitar having a "almost indetectable heel fissure repair"...........yup, cracked heel, but one of those "try and find another" situations -- and told in an almost "fatherly advice" manner. Miss ya, Stan! Good stuff.

[allenhopkins]

...Cold, clinical, all but sterile is the direction preferred by the electronically driven marketplace now....well written language is a joy to read...Allen, think of how his description of a "Schmergel Devastator" might read!

Methinks there's a fairly broad range between Stan's more rococo flights of intricately interlaced adjectives, hypothetical historical linkages, and catchy if far-fetched metaphors, and "cold, clinical, all but sterile." And I do take the point made a few posts above: Stan was trying to do in prose what other dealers attempted to convey photographically -- flatter, attract interest, get the prospective buyer to linger for a few minutes on the page or screen.

No one has ever accused me of short-windedness -- not on the Cafe, surely. But what bothered me, albeit slightly, were the frequent "stretches" to make a nice instrument seem uniquely appealing, evoking angelic choirs and the sound of King David's lyre, when what it was, was a decent '20's A-4 with replaced bridge and tuners. Mandolin Brothers prices always edged toward the high end of the market, and I sometimes wondered if the extra $200 was to compensate for the 750-word catalog description.

And yes, I would like to have Stan's description of the Shmergel Devastator -- had he been lucky enough to have one pass through his showroom. I usually fall back on "indescribable," which is no help at all, at least in describing things.

[taptuned]

Quick quotes by Stan

On a 1957 O-18 Martin.......How did they stuff all those notes in this little guitar ?

On a 1943 Martin D-28..........This is the Big one Hannah.

[multidon]

I just wanted to point out that Stan didn't do long florid descriptions of every instrument. Just look at the old Vintage News copies. A lot of the time there is just a listing with price and condition. He must have reserved those verbose descriptions for instruments he was particularly impressed with. And yes, he was trying to sell said instrument, but he often went far beyond into another dimension. I mean, some of the analogies he came up with! Comparisons with references so esoteric that many of us had to look them up before we could even get what he was driving at! When he really got going his analogies could make my head swim. It was just fascinating to he, and in my opinion a great illustrative microcosm of how his mind worked.

[J.Albert]

Allen wrote above:
"So, I miss Stan and his catalog and website "mini-essays," but in the end I might "cleanse the palate" with the more terse and evaluative descriptions at Elderly, Carter Vintage or Gruhn."

I'd been thinking the same thing myself, reading this thread over the past few days.

I'm a dour, blunt, Joe Friday "just the facts, ma'am" kinda guy. (remember what Popeye said: "I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam")

Looking at Henry Eagle's post #11 above, I prefer Frank Ford's description. It actually tells me more useful information about that particular piece.

I still miss Stan, however!

[Oliver A.]

I subscribed to "The Vintage News" all through the eighties and nineties. ('not sure of the exact dates) I subscribed mainly for the entertaining style of Stan's prose but received an education in vintage fretted instruments as a bonus. I don't think that I would have bothered reading a bunch of dry descriptions of product in another catalog.

I remember when Stan first offered to buy my mandolins. The thing that exited me most was that I might get the Stan Jay treatment in the Vintage News myself. Well Stan didn't disappoint. He had me living in the woods with a pet ferret. He made that leap because, at the time, I was living in a farmhouse with no internet, email and only a rotary landline. We comunicated mostly by letters.

I know that somewhere in the house I have a stack of those old Vintage News magazines but I haven't been able to dig them up yet. I do know that I did not throw them out.

I agree with the person who suggested that whoever has the rights to those old catalogs should put them all together and offer them for sale. I think just reprinting them all, then putting them in a nice, three ring binder would be great for any vintage instrument afficianado.

Of course Stan was trying to sell instruments, that was his business. I personally thought his descriptions were great. I used to marvel at the way he would crack "in jokes" in the middle of describing a $100,000. pre-war Martin or Loar mandolin. That took some kahunas in my books. You can say that he pushed prices to the max but you can also say that he was one of a few dealer/collectors at the time that raised the general appreciation and awareness of the real worth of these instruments that usually got treated as quaint "folk-art" at best by "serious collectors".

Myself, I have nothing but fond memories of Stan Jay and certainly miss his colorful presence in the field of fretted instruments.

[MikeEdgerton]

In all I bought two mandolins, two banjos, a guitar, a few instrument cases and a slew of smaller stuff from Mandolin Bros. His prices were always fair in my book and he had the things I wanted to buy. When I bought my F5G I was standing playing every instrument on the wall and he walked in and said "We don't adhere to Gibson's price policies, that will cost you X dollars (can't remember exactly) and less than that if you pay by check". I bought the F5G I'd been playing on and off for a few hours and never regretted it. My main stage guitar came from Stan as well. I got the F5G cheaper than I could get it anyplace else that I could find that had it. I had some real memorable moments in that shop over the years.