Worst mandolins ever

What are your oppinions for the worst sounding or looking instruments ever? Which mando do you think are the junkiest of junk? Well here is my oppinion.

There is a Alpha [?] mandolin that is in our local music store for 75 bucks. I tried it. It sounds awful, and i don't think it is very attractive. No wonder they had it in there so long. Has anyone heard of these? Well maybe there ok used but i doubt it.

What are your oppinions on those bad mandos? Post pictures also.

[Lee]

Let's not sit around and bash bad mandolins; cheap or expensive. Interesting topic but some people own them.

[Scotti Adams]

..good call Lee

[John Rosett]

how about ways to improve really bad mandolins.
i once bought a really cheap F style mando from a guy for $50. it had been painted with a nice, heavy coat of black latex house paint, and i was hoping that there might be a desent mando underneath. WRONG! it was all plywood, and in the first "refinish", it had been sanded through in numerous places.
so i stained it bright red. that didn't help the tone, so i cut a hole in the top and dropped a seymour duncan mando-sized humbucking pickup in it. talk about tone improvement! more volume and projection than just about any mandolin you'll ever hear.
just one man's solution......
john

Yea maybe my topic was a little too harsh. Sorry for starting it, but i thought it would be an interesting thing to discuss. In other topics you all bash cheap mandos just as much. So i am deffinately not the first.

[fatt-dad]

I can see both sides of this one, but I was at an old-time jam and a very good fiddle player pulled out his new $59.00 mandolin and it just hurt my ears. Completly tiney and just all around bad. Now I have some mandolins that are better than others and I try to price them accordingly, but his was a real stinker. The fact of the matter was, he knew it and nowbody cared (o.k. maybe I did). He knew what he was buying and had a real nice fiddle.

f-d

[John Craton]

Since I don't know the brand name, I guess it would be safe to mention this one. I bought a cheapie Russian-made mandolin awhile back that was perhaps the most clumsy-looking one I've ever seen. Surpsingly, it still had a rather decent sound, though I never got an opportunity to test it thoroughly. The action was set so high it could not be played above first position, and I resold it before getting around to lowering the action. Despite its homeliness, it probably made its new owner a decent knock-around instrument.

[8ch(pl)]

Look, I had an El Degas laminated top mandolin complete with warped neck. It played and sounded terrible and when I got a new instrument, I ran it through a bandsaw to get a better look at the dowels in the neck joint. I would be sympathetic to anyone who has one, or the identical sunken top Conquerer that a friend of mine paid too much for. Bad is bad though.

[Lee]

PGAfan, I didn't mean to jump down your throat, just didn't want to see anyone's feelings get hurt. Many of us can't afford a Collings MF and there are those of us who have a tough time getting together a C-note.

Has anyone ever made a mandolin into a lamp? http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Bob DeVellis]

Or a lamp into a mandolin, for that matter.

[AlanN]

Jethro once wrapped a mandolin around a lamp-post in Knoxville http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Keith Miller]

the 1st mandolin I bought was from ebay, picture looked nice but...warped neck and table, still can't bring myself to part with it though, sentimental maybe but it started me off on the long slippery road to MAS. We all have to start somewhere and not everyone can afford to fork out big money on a starter instrument.
Keith.

[8ch(pl)]

Hey, Operaguy, I also owned a Russian flat top that sounded decent. It was my first mandolin and I played it 6 or so years. I then bought the afore-meantioned El Degas,it was not better, I ended up playing the Russian one. It was OK but the frets were not standard (they were corrugated) and a couple fell out. I now have a decent Samick A and a lovely Mid Missouri. I don't feel too much envy for the big names, but I have played a Weber that was nice and someday may buy it , or a Gibson A9. I really love the Mid Missouri. I have upgraded it with a home made ebony pickguard, a Weber tailpiece and am waiting for an armrest from Elderly that was shipped last week. Maybe next year I will get a better set of tuners. The tailpiece improved the sound quite a bit.

For a long time I was stuck with mediocre instruments, you play better on an instrument you like. That is what I mean by Bad is Bad, from my other post.

[mandolooter]

Keith...I been there too! It was my second, well first if the mandolute doesn't qualify as a true mando and I still have it to remind me that pic's don't always tell the whole story and to be careful before hitting the Confirm Bid button. It sit's next to my computer unplayed but earning it's keep! Popsickle sticks under the bridge to raise it above the sunken top, etc! LOL

[Moose]

Hey Alan.. ; what's that 'bout Jethro and a mandolin..!!http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif - http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/mandosmiley.gif http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif

[GMatt]

A Fender (my first mando) and it is still with me today even though the fretboard is so narrow and makes a cracking noise everytime I play a note.

[Scotti Adams]

Well..I gotta say that my worst mando ever was (insert your worst here) but it turned out to be the best because it was the first mando my dad ever bought me and tought me 3 chords on....if it wasnt for that mando and the love, devotion and instruction my dad gave me I wouldnt be at the point I am today. Thanks Dad.

[fatt-dad]

My first mandolin was given to me by a girl when I was in 10th grade. It was a Kay and I kept it until I bought my Gibson A-3 (how's that for a step up). Well, the Gibson had some seam separation other signs of living in an attic, so I gave my buddy (a start-up luthier) $75.00 and my Kay to make it playable. He still has it to this day and It's mine if I come up with the $50.00 to get it back. That was 19 years ago. I have to admit that everytime I try to play my Framus, I wonder why I still have it. If it weren't for the fact it was a gift from my sister's boyfriend, who bought it with his deceased wife at a yard sale, I would have let it go. But it remains in my collection.

I also have a real poor quality taterbug that was from a friend's grandmothers estate (Boston circa 1900s). It is a hand made job that she played in a mandolin orchestra, but don't get your hopes up - it ain't much. I think I can only note on maybe 20 percent of the frets between the bowed neck and the sunken top. Oh well, it is yet another wall hanger.

f-d

[fatt-dad]

Maybe here is the better question, what have you bought for under $100.00 that was really playable? I have a $41.00 Hondo oval hole and a few others that are just fine mandolins.

f-d

PGAfan, I didn't mean to jump down your throat, just didn't want to see anyone's feelings get hurt. Many of us can't afford a Collings MF and there are those of us who have a tough time getting together a C-note.


Yea i didn't think before i started this. The only thing that was in my head was that cheap mando at the store. You deffinately need to be cautious when postin stuff like this. I have enjoyed readin these other post though. And if anyone has these mandos i say... its alright because everyone has to start somewhere.

[evanreilly]

I had one of them biiiigggg, fat Hondo F-hole mammas. I got a bit of experience playing with sanding off the finish and trying a few methods of re-finishing. Playing it?? It hurt my fingers!!!

[Rick Schmidlin]

Worst mando I ever played was one at a Sam Ash.I won't name the brand but in three years I bet they never changed the strings and the thing got deader and dead. I used to check for fun just to how bad the strings were going to effect it and how dead it was getting.

Rick http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif

[fatt-dad]

If you ever want to see first hand the value of a professional setup try it yourself on a used Hondo. The misery that I endured trying to get the nut action correct was painful. It's better with the nut shimmed up with aluminum foil than it was originally though - ha.

[rattler]

I couldn't resis after the "lamp" comment.

This is the rare and highly sought after "Lloyd Loar Floor"
model.

I had a Washburn...but it caught fire.

[newbreedbrian]

first was an "anjo" mandolin. played as awful as it sounded and was a lot of fun to try to get in tune

[mandopoet]

By far this is the cheapest and worse-sounding mandoline that I've come across.

http://cuisinaide.com/mandoline_small.jpg

[gtrump]

The worst for me was also my first, a Fender FM52e. It had a horrible action and a tinny tone. Believe it or not, it got even worse once it was plugged in. It sounded so bad that my wife would run to the other side of the house every time I even threatened to bring it out.

I finally gave the Fender to my brother after I bought a better mando.

I used to think my wife hated the Fender because I was a beginner and not very proficient. In six years I have managed to improve a little, enough to where she actually enjoys listening some of the time. Well, I went to see my brother and he brought out the old mando for me to jam with him. It took all of two minutes until she was ready to break it over my head. Yes, definitely the mando.

Strangely, I've played a few other FM52e Fenders and they weren't bad, so I've come to this conclusion: Mine was made on a Friday by a drunken assistant-luthier's assistant who'd had a nasty fight with his wife the night before and decided to take his frustrations out on an innocent piece of nato.

[Pedal Steel Mike]

Maybe here is the better question, what have you bought for under $100.00 that was really playable?
I bought a Korean mandolin called VENSON about a month ago at the NAMM show, after my Gibson broke, just to have something to tide me over until I could get a better one. (That happened sooner than I expected.)

I paid $100 for it at the show, which means it probably sells for around $250-300 in stores. It is solid mahogany. You can see the cross section of the grain if you look at the F holes.

It's not a great mandolin by any means, but it's playable, and doesn't sound too bad.

These new Korean guitars and mandolins are a godsend to people who can't afford an expensive instrument, or who want an inexpensive one to take to bar gigs and other places where they are subject to theft or abuse.

[Dagger Gordon]

We've all seen some awful ones, but it's nice when they're a bit better than you expected. I've got a cheap thing called an Encore which I take camping etc. As Mike says, 'it's playable and doesn't sound too bad'. Good enough for what I want it for.
I recently played a fairly cheap mandolin that I helped a girl pick out about 10 years ago, and which I hadn't seen since. I was pleased to see that despite it probably having the same strings, it was indeed a reasonably good instrument.
We can't all afford a Collings, but it doesn't mean you have to play something that's virtually unplayable.

[gnelson651]

My worst was my first no-name eBay piece of junk. You would think I would of had a clue when the shipping cost more than the mando. But NOOOOO! I had to go cheap because I wasn't sure I would stay with the mando. With this no-name junker, the bridge had the same distance between each string, #you needed a crowbar to play at the 1st fret, and it would sound the same after the 7th fret. I tried to play amateur luthier and replace the bridge, file down the nut and make it playable. The new bridge caused the plywood top to cave in.

A few months after the cheapee, I bought a #Morgan Monroe MMA-1 from Elderly. They set it up really nice and the action was like butter compared to the eBay junker.

So, when our pastor left for a new church last month, I had the string band sign the crapo mando and gave it to him as a going away present. He was our b*nj@ player so he commented about trying to play the thing. I told him stick to the b*^j@, the mando played best as a wall hanger. http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[pelone]

I purchased two mando "projects" on e-bay to learn how mandos were construced. Both of them came to me in parts and I had a ball sweating apart the damaged segments that were still clinging to one another. One of them had been made in Mexico and sold by Casa Veerkamp, a well respected outfit that also sells pianos. After much TLC, the rebuild turned out to be drop dead sweet with the nicest voice that I could have hoped for. A very nice project for thirty seven dollars. The other mando was built by a dude in Kansas City in 1937, signed in pencil on the brace. My investment of forty bucks gave me an heirloom that, after set up, is distinct and honorable. Not all of us can justify the outlay of thousands of dollars for an instrument. I went to a jam last week where the player that really rocked was chopping a PAC RIM that he bought for $59--- sometimes the skill can just overcome some short comings.
It was fun to watch some of the strollers come up to the guy with their heads tilted to the side as they were reading and judging the name of the instrument and then seeing them lurch backwards when they realized that a cheapy was putting out so much sound. It seems that there are snobs in all crowds.

[garyblanchard]

Let's not sit around and bash bad mandolins; cheap or expensive. Interesting topic but some people own them.
Lee -

Very thoughtful of you. I own 2 (count 'em) Johnson mandolins, an A and an F. They are, admittedly, not the best mandos ever made, but they fit my limited budget and make me happy. It is nice to see us poor folks defended now and then. #http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/mandosmiley.gif

[Dfyngravity]

The very first mando I bought bought(not going to mention any names)was at first not to bad, but needless to say the neck began to warp and it had no truss rod so I bought me a new one. But I did find a good use for it....I took the fingerboard off, put a truss rod in, new fingerboard, new nut, new tuners, new bridge and a new tailpiece. So basicly I turned a $60 mando into a $200+ mando. Some might ask why, well I have been wanting to learn how to do repair and eventually build and this was the perfect project to start. And it acutally turned out pretty good, it has a much better tone, volume and playability.

[John Flynn]

My first mandolin was a "Lotus Teardrop Mandolin," made of extra-select Korean plywood, by luthiers with many years experience...building cheap furniture. They gave it the name "teardrop" because it sounds so bad you want to cry! Seriously, though, this thing was a true POS. It just would not stay in tune and stuff rattled on it all over the place. I loved it, though. For the year I owned it, I could not put it down. It changed me from being primarily a guitar player to being a mando player. A year later, I got most of what I had in it on a trade-up. So it definitely served its purpose well.

[cutbait2]

hey, i've still got one of those Lotus tear drop A's. you must all be mando snobs. i've got two kids to put thru private school and payments on the new tundra. some of us can't afford more than two gilchrists...... my lotus costs me $20 and sounds great for the money......all kidding aside i did learn a couple songs on it, developed a pretty strong left hand too...its available by the way, will post pics

[John Flynn]

you must all be #mando snobs. i've got two kids to put thru private school and payments on the new tundra. some of us can't afford more than two gilchrists
Not a snob, just callin' it like I see it. I just finished putting two through private school and now they are both in college with one headed for law school next year. I got to play a Gilchrist once, which is as close as I will ever get to one! I get by with my Rigel A+ and my Parsons Flat-top, though.

BTW, I only paid a few more dollars for my Parsons used in 2004 than I did for that Lotus new in the early 90's. I guess one lesson learned is that if you only have a little money, shop the used market and shop it hard. You will get a much better instrument for your limited dollars.

[cutbait2]

I was kidding of course, i think the new pac rims $400 up, are way better than the harmony i started on in ( well, a long time ago). for less than that you can get some decent A models (relatively speaking), but when you get below $100 its pretty much all stuff for temporary use.......although my lotus looks about the same today as it did in '83

[cutbait2]

ps I know a couple older fellows who play pac rims..one plays a kent 675 the other a fender something...they can pick your eyes on any Monroe tune you name...they sound good too

[gnelson651]

I think that the lower end instruments give alot of people an opportunity to start mandolin. I found that once you start, your hooked for life. I have since replaced the Morgan Monroe MMA-1 with an Eastman 805. I suspect that the Eastman will be my last purchase, although I would love to have an oval hole Eastman. I still have my MM which I still play from time to time. The 805 stays in its case but the MM sits out for when I feel like noodling. Also the MM is my beater.

I know that there a mando snobs out there, but that is true for just about any avocation (like skiing, golf). I am fortunate (or not) to live in a mando desert where the Eastman is top of the line in this area. The local music stores carry only low end A models such as Samick, Fender or Washburn. http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/mandosmiley.gif

I say that if you play a mandolin and better yet, play it well, no matter what price range, your better off than the b*^g@ player with a Mastertone. # http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif

[Lee]

Here's what my guitar-playing neighbor said about my first mandolin. "When I saw you walking home holding that triangular box I knew you were in for a big dissapointment." #He was right. #The next day I returned it in exchange for an Epiphone MM30. Excellent instrument, served me well for many years and was heartbroken when the new owner walked out my door. I think the triangular box contained a Hondo. Unplayable, don't go there. If that's all the money you have, get something used. Over the last fifteen years maybe they've improved.

[cutbait2]

i wouldn't say "mando snob" because frankly there's big differences between the average entry level and a good custom (not that all customs are good either). i think folks are usually just trying to be objective. i've never been to a jam where the gil owners wouldn't play with the kentucky owners. it's all about the pickin'. a good picker on a kentucky (or whatever) will be welcome anywhere. a gil owner stumbling over a break, or choping out of time may not. that's an exageration of course but my experience......you probably wouldn't record or perform with the kentucky because it may have have the volume, but that varies, some of those 800's? are pretty good

[fatt-dad]

I have an oval hole Hondo that I gave $41.00 for on ebay. I have some ft-74s on it and wacked the nut off to file the underside (hard to justify paying for a setup). Got the action pretty close and it rests (who can afford a case) on the wall in my office. It's really not that bad.

What's bad is a mandolin that you expect to be good, but stinks. My hopes were not too high when the Hondo was delivered.

f-d

[mando_pete]

I've gone the spectrum from $60 dollar e-bay beater to mid-range to custom built.

I bought the beater to see if I would take to the instrument... And I did
I bought the mid range to see if I could improve with a better instrument ... And I did

I bought the custom made so I could have the tone and action I wanted, and so far I have it.

What's my point ?

Every mandolin is great as long as YOU enjoy it and it does what YOU want it to do.

I love my $60 e-bay as much as my custom. Why?.... it taught me to play, it abused my fingers, the action was horrible, I had calluses from hell. But it committed me to the mandolin. And I could make music with it.

I love my mid range also. It suits me for certain styles of playing. The intonation is bad but I don't play it up the neck. It is nice for certain things, and it made me a better player. It will be my "jam" mando for quite awhile.

The custom is my true love. BUT, I still play them all.

The beater makes me better on the mid-range because it helps me keep my calluses and my finger stretch and strength improve every time I play it.

The mid range makes me better because I have to fret more accurately than I do on the custom built. And my touch can be lighter so I'm faster.

When I hit the custom built everything comes together because of the other two. I can use a light touch and my fretting is accurate and I make wonderful music "to me".

Sorry to be so long, but my e-bay special sucks, and I admit it, but I still love it. I hate to see posts about mandolin snobs at jams. I'm not that way. I'll let you play my custom for a set any time we are in jam together and I'll take my turn on your e-bay special, and happily discover that you are a better player than me.

Then we can swap smiles and you can teach me a new tune !!

Hope this made sense ...

--pete

[John Flynn]

What's bad is a mandolin that you expect to be good, but stinks.
That is such a good point! I think an interesting thread topic would be "What is the most dissappointing mandolin, based on it's price and/or reputation, you've ever played?" Mine would be the well-seasoned Gil that I played. It wasn't bad, of course, but it did not live up to the buzz. I played it side-by with a brand new Collings MF5 and I thought the Collings was better in every respect.

[Pedal Steel Mike]

I've never been to a jam where the gil owners wouldn't play with the kentucky owners.
I find that kind of snobbery...well, I don't have a word for it.

There are some really outstanding players who have limited budgets, and some really lousy ones with vast amounts of disposable cash.

If somebody is a hot player, what difference does it make whether he or she has a handmade boutique instrument or an inexpensive Asian import?

[J. Mark Lane]

If somebody is a hot player, what difference does it make whether he or she has a handmade boutique instrument or an inexpensive Asian import?
It certainly doesn't make any difference to me. It might make a difference to them.

[DannyB]

My $89 Lotus is hanging on my wall with the top caved in. I consider it the best mando I ever owned, it was the one I learned to play on!!

[jmkatcher]

I know it's been a while since the last posting here, but I played one bad enough to be worth relating.

It was/is a Dean F-5 "Bluegrass" mandolin that was priced around $500 at one of the local vintage guitar stores. What a piece of junk! Badly made and finished, and with so little tone and volume it was like playing a cheap solid-body electric sans amp. A week earlier I played a Giannini bandolim at about the same price level and really liked the sound and quality, so I'm not being a snob here.

[billkilpatrick]

living very far from anywhere where i might compare one mandolin to another, i was interested to hear the difference in mandolins played on the steve james blues dvd. if i remember correctly he played 2 gibson a's - one an oval, the other with f holes; a banjo in mandolin tuning and an f style electric that used to be owned by yank rachell. to be honest, if any of them were offered to me as gift i'd accept it with an enormous smile on my face. but i have to say that the gibson f hole "a" sounded just terrible. a gibson!?! point being - as a few people have mentioned in preceding threads - it's the instrument that counts and not the label. this doesn't bring much comfort to those of us dependent on the internet for instruments but it's true, none the less.

what i found very useful on the list was the comments that people made in conjunction with their likes and dislikes of certain instruments. it can turn out, for example, that an instrument was not appreciated simply because it didn't make a sound suitable to a specific style of music.

it might be interesting to do a "1 to 10" type poll of those with mass-produced instruments to see which are the most consistently approved of. i imagine the manufacturers would be a little nervous of the results but for those of us way out here in cyber space, it would be a tremendous help.

i have to confess that i am a snob. but it's the sort of snobbery - to borrow a phrase from an english playwrite - that comes from a class of people who can only love that which it owns. if i was stinking rich and could afford to entertain my fancies, i'd be intolerable.

[timothy.c.hicks]

Scott T.'s Nugget (the one he posted a picture of in the Hawaiian shirt thread...) that thing appears to be total junk...

Scott: I'll trade you my collings MT-2 for it straight up

;-)

[Michael Gowell]

Right now on ebay - "The Lloyd", apparently made by a Mr. Lloyd. #Ugliest headstock, scroll, & peghead inlay I've ever seen - a true trifecta of ugly. #For sale by the builder, whose description is pretty amusing: "It has been repaired from an instance with my former wife..."

Sorry, I don't know how to make a link but it's worth an ebay search for "the lloyd mandolin."

[angrymandolinist]

The back's pretty nice...

[Karen Kay]

I started playing mandolin on a $75 Fender my husband found for me. #I played it for about a year & upgraded to a Weber (then on & on and I'm sure I'm not done buying mandolins yet). #A woman we camp with at Winfield wanted to learn to play, so I gave the Fender to her otherwise I'd probably still have it. #I have a soft spot for that Fender. #
Karen

[Dave Schimming]

I once bought a Harmony Monterey mando off of ebay thinking I might have a vintage backup mando. Wrong! Tried to sell it a couple of times at much less than what I originally paid for it. Finally gave it to a niece who expressed an interest in mando. It was worth every penny paid to see the smile on my niece's face when I surprised her with it.

[garyblanchard]

The Lloyd mandolin headstock and logo might look rough, but I think there is a certain rough-hewn charm to it. If my finances were more fluid right now, I might bid myself.

[glauber]

I agree, i think it's funny. It seems, also, that the guy's ex-wife tried to murder the poor thing.

[Eric F.]

You never know, of course. Sometime people invent colorful stories to add to the allure. The classic case is the guy with the Beanie Babies.

I do think that headstock is nasty looking, but the guy no doubt made a better mandolin than I could.

[HarmonyRexy]

I kind of like that Lloyd... The body looks okay... and headstock may not be totally 'it' but its amusing. If his assessment of the tone is accurate, it would be fun... especially thinking about the incident with his former wife. yikes! I might go for it for grins and chuckles...
but I just bought one from a luthier---- and I'm playing the 'waiting game' now. I need patience... extreme patience....
http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif

[elenbrandt-redux]

The first mandolin I ever had (1978) was a plywood "Columbia" that I bought at the Alameda Flea Market from the instrument dealer known as "Blackie". #Its neck was warped, the top was popping off and curling up, and it made "plain jane" sound flashy. And no, it didn't sound very appealing either. What a complete POS -- it is a miracle I still love the mandolin (just not THAT one). #Last time I saw it was on the garage wall of someone I knew whose wife finally stopped using it as a centerpiece for ugly plastic flowers. #Now is THAT bad, or what? http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/coffee.gif

[Ken Sager]

Ah, the "Lloyd" incident with the former wife comment reminded me of an incident when I lived in Afton, Wyoming. A woman was arrested after shooting both her husband, and her boyfriend (one in the rump as he ran away), because they refused to fight over her. It was outside my favorite bar, one of the few that had live music on weekends. Folks there are still talking about that one.

I can only imagine what a "mandolin incident" might be, and what she must have done to it... (notice how I quickly assume she did something to it...) 8*)

[TommyK]

Here's the LINK (http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=10179&item=7331889405&rd=1&ssPageName=WDVW)

[Jim Rowland]

In 1958,I bought a Gibson L- 5 on which I could not play a note. I just always wanted one of them Roy Rogers type guitars. I made the payments by smoking Bugler roll your owns for a couple of years. One night I came home at what my (then)wife thought was an unacceptable hour. I told her I was sorry. She told me to go look in the back yard at my guitar. She had split the headstock with a hammer. That night,I achieved one of the great triumphs of my life. I did not kill her. Seems like, short of going after the gonads,a common wifey revenge is to damage a man's (musical)instrument.
Jim