Instrument Acquisition Syndrome

[mikeyes]

According to the DSM-IV:

Instrument Aquisition Syndrome 305.8x

Specify subtype, Continuous, Episodic (Specify if there are no residual symptoms inter-episode) , Single Episode in partial remission, Single Episode in full remission. Other or Unspecified pattern.

.81 Disorganized Type
.82 Organized Type
.83 Guitar Specific
.84 Mandolin Specific
.85 Residual Type

All of these are well recognized by those of us in the mental health field and there is little that can be done with the exception of acquiring all the Lloyd Loars in the mandolin world and according to the Irish literature collecting all the Paragon banjos although the latter has not been through rigorous testing so far.

We are still looking for a cure so don't despair. In the mean time any suggestions will be welcomed.

Michael J. Keyes, MD

[Morgan Monroe Guy]

Question for the Dr.

I have 42 guitars, 4 mandolins, a banjo, and a fiddle.

Does that make me disorganized with a guitar leaning???

Mike

[PhilGE]

I believe that falls into the Excessive or maybe the Obsessive subtypes with Guitar preferences noted.

Symptoms include, but are not limited to:

Hiding or displaying instrument related paraphenalia in your office at work (the Elderly calendar and mandolin cursors on your PC, for example).
Keeping a secret account to pay for the affliction.
Loss of productivity due to hours browsing the MC Classifieds or surfing oBoy (just how many hours online?)
Significant consequences within marital or intimate relationships as a result of the behavior (just one more, honey! honey? where you goin?)

Phil Good-Elliott, MSW, LCSW (what's that about never self-diagnosing?)

[glauber]

Where does WhOA fit?

[Pedal Steel Mike]

I have 42 guitars

Gee, I only have 27.

I guess I have some catching up to do.

[HarmonyRexy]

Wow.... I'm really concerned after reading Glauber's whOA description since I bet I have 27 just of those.
On the mandolin front... I had not realized until recently that my spouse really has no idea since they are not all in one location... aren't offices great? I got the 'how many' question about 6 months ago. I thought that I'd answered truthfully but later remembered 3 that I hadn't counted.... and that was then....
I guess that I really do need to cool it!...... especially now that it's an "illness"..... I'll need to take a few sick days to deal with this sickness.... and play them hours at a time.... what a great life that would be to have all day to play....:blues:

[Chad Thorne]

Not to disagree with the good dr., but guitar players know this malady well, only we describe it as G.A.S. - Gear Acquisition Syndrome. The term allows for the inclusion of amps and effects as well as instruments...:D

[jerrymartin]

We are still looking for a cure so don't despair. In the mean time any suggestions will be welcomed.

Michael J. Keyes, MD

Yes, I have a suggestion: please stop looking for a cure. What fun would that be?

Jerry M.

[Coy Wylie]

Symptoms include, but are not limited to:

Hiding or displaying instrument related paraphenalia in your office at work (the Elderly calendar and mandolin cursors on your PC, for example).

Keeping a secret account to pay for the affliction.
Loss of productivity due to hours browsing the MC Classifieds or surfing oBoy (just how many hours online?)

Significant consequences within marital or intimate relationships as a result of the behavior (just one more, honey! honey? where you goin?)

Above my desk on the left is the elderly calendar. The cursor is on my screen. I even have Loar wallpaper.

How did you know know about my secret account? Do all of us have secret accounts? # Loss of productivity due to hours logged in at the cafe? Let's just say I'm glad there is not a time meter to guage this as there is on the fiddle forum.

"Just one more, Honey!" Ha!

Maybe big brother is watching after all. I'm no paranoid but they are out to get me.

[mikeyes]

Of course these clinical classifications are not perfect as they tend to be descriptive but all of the various types of acquisition syndromes fall under the IAS rubric. More research has to be done about the various sub-types and I am doing my part by sacrificing myself and trying to duplicate the problem. I know, this is a selfless act that may lead me to be terminally afflicted, but it is for mankind and the advancement of scientific medicine.

I applaud those of you who are helping with this effort and trying to find a cure.

By the way the APA doesn't recognize the DMPMD-I since it did not originate with our organization and therefore has to be bogus.

MJK
Supported by a grant from the National Institute of Acquistion Health (NIAH)