Gigs from below!

[BenE]

We booked a night at a VFW out of town. #We got there and assessed the PA system...it looked like something out of a 1980's roller skating rink. #So we set up our system and rang out the room. #We use one large condenser mic and all play around it like the old days. #We do more of a progressive bluegrass show as opposed to just traditional tunes. #Well the VFW was probably like most around the US. #Lots of older guys smoking and drinking canned beer. #We take the stage and go into the first few tunes. #The crowd was just sitting and watching....no real reaction from them other than a meager handclapping at the end of the songs. #As I told you earlier the sound system they had a POS so we used ours. #We usually do about a hour and fifteen minute set....well, about 30 minutes into the set we had just finished a song when the sound guy/DJ comes over the house PA and says "Folks, give these boys a round of applause and were going to let them take a break". #We all sort of look at each other and go "well, okay, I guess we're taking a break". #The first song the DJ plays is Princes' "Purple Rain". #Everyone in the place gets up and dances. #We have a drink and break for about twenty minutes and go back on stage. #Same scene as before ....people sitting and watching the show....meager clapping at best. #Thirty minutes into the set same damn thing. #DJ comes on and tells the folks the boys are taking a break. This time he starts off with "Low Rider". #Everyone gets up and dances. #We drink.... Next set ...yep, you guessed it....same thing....only this time it's "Funky Col Medina".....everyone dances. #We end up doing about 5 or 6 thirty-minute sets all the time with a DJ saying things like "give the boys a hand" between songs. # I don't know if this guy/DJ brought all the music with him as well as the speakers when he left the roller rink job but he had some cheesy vintage stuff! #After the first set I wanted to pack up and call it a night but we wanted our guarantee so we kept our mouths shut and played on. #It had to be the most depressing gig ever! #Lesson learned....No More VFW's for us!

[Christine W]

I"m sitting here picturing old guys dancing to funky cold medina and prince:D

Sorry about your unfortunate experience but your story makes for a heck of a visual.

[jeffshuniak]

I like the crowded around the old mic part.

do you mind if I ask about this mic. did you guys sound good? I am left handed and I discoverd I can really take atvantage of this and use one mic, at small gigs. the guitar sits left, I sit right, our soundboxes meet with the mic inbetween and infront to catch it all. only, whats the point? I can use two 57's on a yoke stand with boom and sound great. but something , maybe aesthetics, mabye the historian in me, I dont know, I kinda like the idea of this old mic inbetween us while we play. also we play right now, a restaraunt in town, our room is limited.. thats where I figured out to do this boom with twin mic attachment. music stands sits behind that.it doesnt block my view, but its a stretch to turn pages. an old open mic , I could sit actually infront almost between our chairs? then nothing infront of the music stand at all. obviously with more room at a better gig, this wouldnt be neccessary, but the old mic interests me... you guys should have made a publicity pic with you all crowded around it! people could pay for a old timey photographer for something like that.

[John Flynn]

We volunteered to play for a monthly "happy hour" at an assisted living facility, as a favor to a friend. "Assisted living" is sort of halfway between a retirement community and an old folks home. Everone had thier wits about them and could pretty much take care of themselves. We started mid-afternoon. There were about 50 people in the audience and they seemed to enjoy it. They were listening intently, tapping thier feet, applauding, etc. Then, right in the middle of a tune, almost all of them just got up at once and walked out. We were wondering, "what the heck did we do wrong?" We learned later that dinner gets served at 4:30 and no matter what is happening at 4:29, they are headed for the chow line.

[Dru Lee Parsec]

Well, I played with a local rock band in the 70's and 80's. #We played a battle of the bands that was suppose to have 5 bands. #The last band to play set up first and then pushed all their gear to the back of the stage. #Then the 4th band would setup and push it back, then the 3rd and so on. #The 1st band to play had about 4 feet of room for them and their gear.

We were #4 on the list so we setup 2nd. #Band #3 didn't show up. #Band #2 set up and then left. #The place was such a dive they wanted to go drink at a different bar. #Band #1 never showed up. #The club also had punk rock shows there and the back parking lot was so covered with broken beer bottles that we had to borrow a broom and sweep a path for our cars just to have a place to park.

So it's time for the gig to start and bands #1,2 and 3 arn't there, but about 200 people are. #So Jerry Roach, the owner (and only one of the reasons we called his clubs 'the roach motel') asked us to get up on stage. #Oh by the way, instead of your 30 minutes battle of the band set could you play for about an hour and 15 minutes? #And instead of the $50 we were going to pay you you'll now get $50 and two pitchers of free beer.

The lights go down and we start to play while trying to ignore the disturbing visual of seeing roaches crawling on the stage. Thank god we didn't eat there. #I wasn't even sure if I wanted to drink the beer. When we're done we really don't care who wins the battle of the bands we just want out. #So we unload our gear out the back door and into the van and cars. #I have to go back in and get our money. #Well, the next band was already playing and the back door enters directly onto the stage so I had to go around to the front where (and you won't believe this part) THE DOORMAN MAKES ME PAY THE $5 COVER CHARGE TO GO INSIDE TO GET MY MONEY FOR PLAYING THE GIG!

Broken glass, roaches of both kinds, tripling our set time, and then ending up with $45 to split up for 4 people. #I pretty much decided that I didn't want to be in a band any more at that point. #It was about 15 years before I played in public again. #And you know what? It worked out just fine. #I don't think I was cut out to be in an 80's hair band.

[BenE]

This one was not so bad as it is funny. #We occasionally do corporate type parties. Lots of times you really don't know who you're playing for until you get there. #Well, this particular gig was one for retired schoolteachers. #Maybe about 100-150 folks all together and 99% were ladies. #They are all enjoying themselves and having a good time listening to the music. #We kick off some high-energy tune and a couple of the ladies start a conga line and are dancing around this pavilion holding onto one another's waist...before you know it almost all the folks in the bunch are in the conga line. #At first they start dancing around a big circle keeping the time pretty well. #As you might imagine that being retired some of these ladies were on up there in years. #The conga line starts slowing down. #It was all I could do to play my instrument without laughing....the line gets slower and slower.... pretty soon the ladies are all just walking around in a big circle....so what do we do? #You guessed it....we played solo after solo trying to see how long these ladies would dance/walk around the big circle. #Pretty soon the whole conga line slowed to a crawl. #Ladies dropping out like flies. #The line dwindled from about 100 ladies to about 10. #It had to be one of the funniest things I have ever seen at a gig. #Those ladies were a blast! #They came up all night telling us how much they loved our music. #I still get a good laugh about that today. #One lady in particular was probably in her early 70's.....that lady danced all night! #She skipped dinner so she could dance. #The sweetest little lady you have ever seen! #Sometimes you just never know what you're getting into!


Jeff....It sounds like a AT4033 would be the ticket for what your doing. The less crowd noise the better with that style microphone. Sounds great in my opinion. In a loud room it doesn't work quite as well cause it picks up everything! I also like the energy you give off moving in and out around the mic. Certainly adds to the stage show.

[jeffshuniak]

"dinner at 4:30! what a deal!" # - homer j. simpson. (visits father at retirement home) talk about a tv baby.

we were minstreling in seminole mall, right next to freedom village (a retirement home)
so they bring in the elderly before we get there. we start walking one day, and we walked right up to a woman who smelled like number one. poor old lady, but super embarrassing for us to, we had to walk away without being obvious... but that was hard becuase that particuluar smell kinda shocks you when you arent in a bathroom.

[jeffshuniak]

AT4033 so probably better for a stage than a restaraunt... little noisy..

sorry to hijack the thread...

[sbarnes]

gigs from he**....yep, been there, done that
we don't play bluegrass but rockin' country - check us out at: http://www.grits.addr.com/natch.html but a couple of stories are in order here:

1. arrived at a venue several hundred miles away from home, met w/road manager in lobby of hotel (also the show venue) to get room assignments, etc. and noticed we were the only white people there!!! not racist at all but i said 'we're in trouble'....reminded me of the blues brothers where they played the country bar but in reverse....we played our very limited list of soul music a LOT that night....
2. played a venue similar to the vfw story above - not vfw but similar...lots of 'older' people....watched as they toddled (sometimes using walkers) onto the dancefloor and then cut loose w/electric slide, etc...really a hoot....

[dudleyunderhill]

We played for a local singles group, which we soon found out was comprised primarily of divorcees and retirees, most of them in the autumn of life. #We played our regular (rather high-energy) set and got a polite, if unenthusiastic response. #A lot of smiling and nodding, if you know what I mean. #When we finished, they broke out the karaoke machine and took turns singing (in most cases I use this term very loosely) and dancing to hits from the late 60's and 70's. #They were having a blast, once we got out of the way! #While we were loading up our gear, our other guitarist steps over to me and says, "This is just like Cocoon." #I just lost it. #To this day I can't think of that movie without remembering that gig, and it brings a smile to my face every time.

[jlb]

I was at a gig at a company party years ago. These were suit and tie types. They were NOT into acoustic music. During set 2, a drunk guy at the party blasted some music on the stereo. Guess which one of us got pissed off first. No doubt, you guessed it, the b@njo player put his instrument away, went up the guy, and knocked him out cold.

We did not get payed that night.

[Ken Sager]

I played in a rock band years ago. We did a gig in a bar in Cokeville, Wyoming, in 1987. We were a short notice substitute for a band that cancelled, travelled from Salt Lake City (150 miles - 7 hours by VW bus) and set up sound. Immediate electrical issues caused shorts, fried strings (actually had guitar strings melt red hot while unwinding...), burned up an amp, horrid. Anyway, we found out while limping a sound system together that it was an all-nighter to start at 9PM and last until the manager decided we were done. We had four sets of material and ended up recycling every single tune we knew at least once. The only time folks danced was when we played anything by CCR. We were getting requests all night long. Sometimes we'd fake it, mostly we just played Proud Mary, Fortunate Son, and Have You Ever Seen The Rain over and over and over... At one point a drunk came up to me, I leaned over (I was on the stage) and he said "I have known you and loved you for years."

I told him I didn't know that song but I'd ask the guys in the band if they did.

Got paid and split town.

Joy to all,
Ken

[Michael H Geimer]

We were on a co-bill tour with some label mates somewhere before the turn of the century. Well, we had our own crew and PA travelling with us, but would use the house systems to monitor ourselves. We ended up one night in a club with an absolutely hideous sounding monitor system - you'd hear more static and fuzz than you would music.

Now, It is worth noting that while the club was tiny, the stage was high, and the singer for the other group was sporting a huge ego. We were headlining that night, possibly he was sore about that, too.

So, I'm eating my dinner in the dressing room, when all of sudden it gets a little too quite. Then, the tour manager bust in, and yells "Get ready, and get on stage as quick as you can!"

Holy Cow! Turns out the singer got so P.O'd at the poor monitor sound, he picked his monitor up and pitched it right into the crowd!?! Thank god he didn't hit anyone!

Now of course, that would be the same monitor I was set to use in our set. And being the keyboardist, that monitor was my only sound source - with no monitor I literally played by site that night.

What a self-centered jerk, eh? Stupid Rock-n-Roll ego's ... what are you gonna do about 'em.

- Benignus

[oh danny boy]

Folks, this is the funniest thread I've read in quite a while - keep it up!

Dan

[BenE]

Funny things happen at our gigs. When we first got together as a band we were playing an outside BBQ party at this house. #The homeowner worked at a local restaurant and invited all the employees over for music, beer, and BBQ. #Most of the dishwashers were of Hispanic origins and were really into what we were playing. #As the night progressed the booze began to take effect on the crowd. #To make a long story short... one of the dishwasher comes up to us and throws himself down on the ground and starts.....well, I can barely describe what he is doing but to me it looked like the guy was having a seizure. #He was rolling around in the dirt hooting and hollering like he had gotten the spirit. #Before you know it a couple of the other dishwashers join him in this strange dance in the dirt. #It was about 95 degrees out that day and the dirt combined with the sweat these boys were working up made for quite a scene at this nice little backyard BBQ. #Come to find out... next-door lives an older gentleman that plays fiddle. #We told the host to invite him over to play with us..... well, this whole time the fiddle player had been peaking out the window at us playing and the strange sight of these guys rolling around in the dirt. Needless to say he wanted no part of that action! #That was a most interesting BBQ! #again.... you just never know what will happen at a gig!

[Brian Baker]

I've got two:

1. Its one of our first gigs, at an old train depot. Wooden plank floors, great place for live bluegrass. Audience is mostly older folks, many of them farmers... Between songs, I feel the need to tell a b*njo joke to lighten the mood. "Whats the difference between a banjo player and a mutual fund?" [Big silence.] "Eventually, the mutual fund will mature and start earning money!" [Bigger silence.] I don't think anyone in that crowd had any idea what a mutual fund is! Good joke, wrong audience.

2. Gig at a really small country church: just a 40x40 building with an "altar" and two rows of pews. We play our set, and after the last song ("Ill Fly Away") the preacher asks to join us on stage to lead a final prayer before dismissal. Altar/stage is maybe 12 ft wide but not very deep, so the four of us part in the middle to let the preacher in. As he bows his head and starts to pray, realizing I need more elbow room, I step to the side a bit and knock into some sort of wall-mounted chime unit (doorbell? clock?). You never realize the volume you can get out of a set of cheap metal cylinders until you stir 'em up in the middle of the benediction! I had to ask the Lord for forgiveness, but oh man, was it funny...

Brian

[Brian Baker]

Wait, I forgot one more:

Once, I introduced our guitar player (Jerry Henderson) as Jerry Richardson (owner of the Carolina Panthers, and I am in SC so everyone caught the slip up).

Also, once our band had two friends play with us: a guitar player with last name Mayfield, and a fiddle player who looked just like a childhood buddy of mine named Curt. Of course, when I said "Give a big hand for Curtis Mayfield", I got some real strange looks from the guys in the band!

Brian

[mandofiddle]

"Whats the difference between a banjo player and a mutual fund?" #[Big silence.] "Eventually, the mutual fund will mature and start earning money!" [Bigger silence.] #

That's hilarious. I had the exact same thing happen to me at a gig a few years back. I told the "What's the difference between a Harley and a banjo?" joke... You can tune up a Harley. Dead silence while I say... "Um... okay... next tune..."

That and the whole set we played was on a flatbed trailer that wasn't very secure. It kept rocking back and forth the whole set. I thought I was gonna get sick... I kept having to tell a couple members of the band to "Please, try and not rock back and forth"...

[doanepoole]

I once had a gig with a Skruggs-style b@njo player

It was scary...horrifying. I cried myself to sleep that night.

[jim simpson]

Once took a gig to play on a float in a July 4th parade complete with hay bails and noisy generator. The cool thing was our audience was constantly changing so we only had to keep playing the same 2 or 3 songs! We got paid, I split and went on to another one day event where I got to judge at a bluegrass competition. - got paid again! and got to jam onstage.
To recap: the noisy generator was the bad part but the rest was good!

[Nik-chick]

Dying jokes reminded me. I was at a festival on the town square in Smithville (paved, on the 4th of July...I have my celphone cover decorated with nail polish and it was MELTING, made me glad there was none on my hands that day). After we'd been there for a pretty long time we had to go to the car and listen to the festival on the local AM radio with the A/C blasting to keep from getting heat exaustion while listening for the category I was entering (Old-Time Gospel). The hood had to stay up to keep the engine from overheating from that. I got enough of my energy back to have air to sing. Well, as soon as the category before that was about to end we went toward the stage. Because of the walk back and the fact that once we got there we couldn't hear much behind the stage, I, as well as several other people, did not hear the same joke being made OVER and OVER. I was told that I made one of the cleanest versions of it (which is sad, 'cause I thought I was pushing the envelope to say this in a gospel competition). I said "We may be singing about heaven, but this sure feels like someplace else!" I wondered why no one reacted. *L* I hear that even more people did that after me (probably not as many as did that before tho).

I almost forgot to mention that the thermometer (that was part of the decoration) on the stage read 96 degrees. Who knows what it was down on the pavement.

This wasn't a gig from down below at all (nor was it technically a gig since I did one song and I paid them an entry fee). I had a great time! It just FELT like it was down below.

[Frankmc]

Sounds like some of the responses about this topic come from guys who've had some on the road time so you all cast your minds back to the days you did the County/State Fair thing. Not the one day local gig from hell... no, these last weeks. I was the "old guy " (45, what was I thinkn) recruited by a bunch of young (20, 21) guns to play B3 and we got put on the summer
Iowa, Nebaska, Ohio etc fair trip. These are 3, 4, days of 3 sets a day then drive, repeat.. I did this once before...in the 70's . I was 17. The guys were just gung ho and I was trying to get them to take care of their bodys 'cause I knew the toll you pay after 4 weeks of driving , all the fair food you can eat and the mid-west heat. Did they heed dads advice? Nope. I sat behind my B3 and watched as we experianced in no particular order, the bass player throw up on the locals(from the stage) after eating greasy food in 100* Nebraska heat, the lead singer get 2nd degree burns on his feet because, yes a rock star just has to sing barefoot at the front of the stage,the crowd get up and leave because they ( I can't believe I forgot about this stuff when we agreed to set times) announce it's time to wake up "Alice" the gator and feed her chicken... the list goes on.. and... ya know, I'm 50 now and if I could get time off from work this summer.....

Frank

[MOP]

We played second part after a well known female singer and our lead singer was so afraid that he sung out of ton.

[Greg H.]

I think this one should fit the gigs from below catagory pretty well. We were playing in a biker bar in Tulsa with a marquee out front that said 'Bomb Iran Today!' (that should set the era for those of us who remember the late 70s). We were about halfway through the first set when a girl comes up to the side of the stage and says 'Will you play Will the Circle Be Unbroken for Loser, he just got buried today?'. I nod and relay the message to our bass player, who promptly gets a grin on his face, walks up to the mike and says "We're going to play Will the Circle Be Unbroken for Loser who just got married today. Congratulations Loser!" A guy at the front who looked to weigh around 300 (and probably all muscle from tossing Harleys around in the shop) jumped up sending his pitcher of beer crashing to the floor and yells "buried %#%@ %^#@ it." After profuse apologies, a few silent prayers, and futile glances at the exit things calmed down and it ended up being a pretty good gig (they payed well and were quite appreciative). For a while there though I would have gladly payed them to let me leave rather than expect payment for the the music.

[mrmando]

I"m sitting here picturing old guys dancing to funky cold medina and prince:D

Those were the Gulf War veterans!