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lorrainehornig

Choking: Let it Go and Let it Happen

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I don’t know about you, but when I really try to do something well or when something is especially important to me I “choke”. I know that choking is the result of over-thinking. Apparently the brain can’t process the act of thinking about excellence and executing excellence simultaneously. The brain-to-fingers connection just breaks down. For me, the importance of how well I play is directly related to who might be hearing me (an obvious lack of confidence on my part). If I think my husband is listening in on my practice, I choke; if I am trying to play with my daughter (an excellent guitarist), I choke; if after hours and hours of practice I want to play really well at my lesson, I choke. I also choke as I approach a difficult measure or series of measures where I have to be conscious of my pick direction (as in multiple triplets and playing Down-Up-Down, Down-Up-Down, etc.) Understanding the dynamics of “choking” is one thing…getting past it is quite another.

I had an interesting experience the other day. This experience showed me how an interruption in the thought process allowed me to play at a level I had never experienced before. I was in my craft room where I scrapbook, quilt and practice music. I have a television in there as I love listening to old movies while I am being creative. On this particular day I was rather engrossed in a movie and stopped what I was doing to watch. When the movie paused for a commercial break I picked up my mandolin and started practicing scales and chords. Now, I NEVER practice with distractions around me. Practice is just that…practice. And while I love practicing, it can get a little frustrating when, after hours of it, I continue to make the same mistakes over and over again. So anyway, following the commercial break, I continued watching the movie and after about twenty minutes I noticed that I was playing (by memory) a piece I had been practicing that had been causing me to choke at a particularly difficult series of triplets. I was playing perfectly. I continued to “practice” as the movie progressed and I have to say I had one of the best practice sessions ever.

I learned two things from this experience: first, that my habit of choking was taking a big toll on my confidence. Second, I came away with the knowledge that yes, I can play…and I can play well. I just have to get over myself.

So here comes the dilemma: aside from practicing with my television on and taking it along with me when I go for my lessons (just kidding), how can I learn the habit of shutting off my brain. How do I just let it go, tune out who is around me and let my fingers do what they are capable of doing? Where do I find the “Zen” of mandolin? These are big questions in my mandolin universe!

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Updated Sep-03-2013 at 10:01am by lorrainehornig (grammatical error)

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  1. abuteague's Avatar
    Lorrainehornig,
    If I have to perform a piece, I practice while standing up, walking around, after exercise, or with a bright light in my face. I have played while something else was playing on the radio. I think of it as increasing the resilience of memory.
    It is like a test instead of a practice. Check out this video on the topic.

  2. Bertram Henze's Avatar
    The effect is also thoroughly described in Sian Beilock's book Choke.
    My recipe works in two steps:
    1 - silence. No words in my head.
    2 - darkness. No pictures in my head.

    #1 is the easier of the two, but #2 is not impossible either. Both can be practised whenever you are in autopilot mode - driving your car, sitting in a restaurant, watching TV, whatever does not require your thinking. There may be words and pictures outside your head, that's OK as long as you don't let them in.

    After a while you won't need this aid anymore because you learn to trust your playing. The lack of trust is the core problem. Your procedural memory does the playing, but your doubtful declarative memory (which does the thinking) gets in the way like a pesky car passenger who tries to tell the driver how to drive.
  3. lorrainehornig's Avatar
    Bertram Henze - Thanks so much...that was awesome! I just downloaded that book to my iPad.
    Updated Sep-03-2013 at 10:05am by lorrainehornig
  4. lorrainehornig's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by abuteague
    Lorrainehornig,
    If I have to perform a piece, I practice while standing up, walking around, after exercise, or with a bright light in my face. I have played while something else was playing on the radio. I think of it as increasing the resilience of memory.
    It is like a test instead of a practice. Check out this video on the topic.

    Thanks, that was a great video!