Caption Contest

[John Ely]

My first mandolin - What do you think?

$7000 for a Calton case with 15' wheels & a bulldog hitch.....you gotta be kidding!!

[John Zimm]

Is this the new Distressed Master Model?

-John.

[Andrew Reckhart]

"A little to the left...Easy..... Watch yer fingers!"

[Ken Sager]

Are you taking it in the bank for a title search? Did you get the 3.9% financing or were you forced to use the higher RV rate?

Ken

--------------
Player of New & Used American made mandolins...

Are you sure it will fit in the safety deposite box..........

Damn.......the bass player got his in the door by himself...!

Somebody take the dolly & go get my pick......!

[John Flynn]

"The giants will never miss this." #

For those who missed the reference, this was an often used line in the old "Land of the Giants" TV series in the late 60's. The humans in the drama survived by stealing giant-sized stuff from the giants without getting caught. They would take the stuff and adapt it for thier use. A giant needle became a spear, giant thread became rope, etc.

[Andrew Reckhart]

"Really Big Tone... Tons of chop and the highs are to die for... a real banjo killer!"

[Andrew Reckhart]

Customer~ "My mandolin has a terrible buzz that I can't seem to get rid of. What do you think the problem could be?"

Repairman~ "Bring her in and let me look at 'er"

Putting it away is for the best honey.....ever since that E string broke & decapitated the banjo player the rest the band won't let me play it!

[Tom C]

I'm here Charlie! I'd like a real flowerpot inlayed.

[Mando4Life]

What do you mean 3 years for a varnish finish !?!?!?!

[GTison]

I'm glad that ATM is handy to pay for my new "Red Henry" bridge.

[chirorehab]

You know what they say about guys with big mandos....

Big picks....


Eric

Don't scratch it!!....I knew I should of ordered that gigbag from Goodyear.......

[mad dawg]

"It's not the size that counts -- it's how you play it."

[blammo]

"They weren't kidding…these things really "open up" after you break 'em in"

[Tom C]

Just in stock! Chernobyl mandos.

[chirorehab]

No wonder Dudenbostel's waiting list is 7 years long!

Eric

[blammo]

Presenting the new "Andre the Giant" Signature model…distressed, distended, and discomforting…but the most mandolin for the money!

[Fred G]

"welcome to the Troy banjo store, Is that trojan mandolin a present for us?"

[PCypert]

"World's Smallest Mandolin Player Sighted Yesterday"

[Fred G]

"Hi, we'd like to buy a couple of banjos to paddle our mandolin down the snake river"

[Tom C]

Can you press on that 7th fret so WE can play a G chord?

[GaryM]

"uhhh..... I'd like to make a large deposit"

[AlanN]

Now, that there is a LONG neck mando.

Careful dang it.........you don't get these in a box of "Breeze" ya know!

[John Flynn]

Here we see a rare example of the mando-contra-bass.

BTW........when I hit 2000 posts every member should send me $1....I need a new keyboard!

[Mandodoc]

"Forget about that Piccolo mandolin, I got the Grande mandolin."

[Mandodoc]

"It's signed Lloyd Large."

[craig]

D'Addario strings = $739.00
Hernia repair = $3416.00
The look on the Banjo player's face = PRICELESS!

[Jacob]

http://news.mpr.org/features/2003/07/24_baxtera_thebigmove/images/paulkids_large.jpg

"Mister Bunyan, they found your mandolin."

"And today on news around Nashville" ...Discrental Gibson employee tries to still BIG JOE's mandolin while Joe and Charlie get a cup off Coffee at the Gibson Cafe...

Thief was caught later on Briley Parkway after wrecking his car when the mandolin he was carrying apprently broke a E string and caused him to loose control of the car.

[Ted Eschliman]

<Grunting>
Last time I had THIS much trouble getting my instrument in the door, I quit taking ######...

[Tom C]

Thanks for the mandohack blue

[Karen Kay]

Whattya mean the warranty expired yesterday?

[Mando4Life]

Headline: "Scientists finally reveal what really landed at Roswell, NM"

[Joe F]

"It's the ideal outdoor festival mando: Play it by day, sleep in it at night!"

[Harrmob]

This will never fit in the safety deposit box

I said "you can bank on some big mandolin leads" not "big mandolins meet at the bank"

Texas

One man's ego versus a banjo, now who is louder?

[G_Smolt]

"...First the NFL, then Baseball, Now Bluegrass: The Steroid Problem."

[Karen Kay]

No, I said I wanted it installed on a pickup.
Richard

[Harrmob]

Stupid Ebay...

[Nik-chick]

Wow, Honey! You really weren't lying about the size of your instrument.

-----
I like Mandohack's the best *L*

[Dru Lee Parsec]

I swear, I pressed the "Quick Cash $40" button on the ATM and this came out!

Or how about:

Back in California they give you a toaster when you open a new checking account. #But here in Nashville . . .

OK, one more

The Nashville Musical Instrument museum is getting ready to show it's collection of 1920's Lloyd Large mandolins.

[Fuzzyway]

Do you have any J74s' for an F-5 Jumbo model?

fuzzy

[Greenmando]

The Hard Rock Cafe has a giant guitar, so we got a giant mandolin for the Mandolin Cafe

[Brookside]

"Somebody take my picture and squander some bandwidth with it."

[mandopete]

Strong like bull, Big like French bread!

[pathfinder]

I'll weld the kids' swing set and monkey bars together, and then I'll have a Toneguard! http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/mandosmiley.gif

[Harrmob]

Every met a luthier that never learned his....scale?

[jaybee]

Dampit was too wet...this sucker just swelled up!

[Flowerpot]

You mean those Simonoff plans were in inches, not meters?


Or...


This thing needs a re-fret. Got any railroad track?

[Mandodoc]

Fred, I told you they wanted a "Big Band" sound for this gig.

[Burbs]

I think I'll take another break. #...YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT?
or
Let's play "REALLY BIG MON"
or
dang, never let a guy from Texas build you a custom mando
or
"say hallo' to my little friend" http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/mad.gif

[GaryM]

"shutup!! I dont know what it is either!! I'll just hit it one more time with this big mandolin!!"

[elenbrandt]

Perhaps if I hang ornaments and lights on it, my wife will not notice my new acquisition....

[Staramouche]

"Inches...meters...damn Yurapeen 'no return' policy...you KNOW I'll be a'sleepin' with the hounds when the wife sees this..."
"I reckon they're less hairy, though"

~~~~~~~~~~~Joe

[Skip Kelley]

Owning a mandolin like this...50,000 dollars; being able to play the four-fingered G chop chord... priceless!

[Greenmando]

We found one that even Chris Thile needs help on.

[atetone]

Yes, it is an archtop, and yes it does give you an arched back.

[Andrew Reckhart]

My mandolin can beat up your mandolin.


Jethro git the door, we just got the new Gibson John Holmes signature model!

[mad dawg]

"World's Smallest Mandolin Player Sighted Yesterday"
PCypert: LMAO!

[craig]

stupid santa! i said back "packer" mandolin, not back "breaker"!

Hey...........quit bumping the auction thread down the list #http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif

You guys can't hide.....I'm cyber stalking for potential bidders.......Who I can stomp on.....Uhahahaha.........

[Russ(String-Alley)]

if it it was made by an old time Russian builder it would have a scale in "arshins" (nobody is going to get that one....sorry)

now lets see that "chopper guy" make one out of that thing. The F5-chopper.

"help....I fallen and I'm pinned under a mandolin"

"Go figure, I put all these busted mandolins in the woodchipper and this thing came out"

"so..... thats what happens if you put your mando on the Chet Atkins diet"

"post a picture of your cat....sleeping inside a giant mandolin"

[ManjoMan]

"Honey....I blew up the mandolin!"

[Randy]

"Honey, I just dropped my ###### into the mandolin. You don't think it will hurt anything, do you?

MASS M.A.S

"I need to return this. I specified a flowerpot head stock inlay."

New Sequoia top mandolin. Gigantic sound from gigantic trees.

[Django Fret]

"I think I have achieved critical MAS..."

[Harrmob]

[QUOTE]My mandolin can beat up your mandolin

Good one.... that one gave me a chuckle!

[ronlane3]

The newest craze in workouts the Mandocise.

or

Hey dude, can you build me a custom Calton for this?

[Nik-chick]

You KNOW I had to comment on this "instrument" since I didn't say anything about the fact that there's a thread entitled "Happy Member!"

[mandoJeremy]

http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif #http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif # http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[chirorehab]

"Doc, I play this mandolin for at least 8 hours a day & I have to carry it with me to every gig. Do you think this has something to do with my back pain?"

Eric

[levin4now]

[grumbling] "Gee whiz, if my wife says that my mandolin is way too big a part of my life again, I'm gonna...."

[VKochetta]

Action? Why, I use a manly action, of course... just like Bill

--- Vinny Kochetta

[ShaneJ]

Yeah, Hi. We've got a delivery for Elvis Costello.

[Bobbie Dier]

Darling, I know we are going to have a long happy life together.

[Mandolin Guy]

Not another 3 hour gig. My back is killing me.

[zeke]

Headline: "Local archeologist finds proof of time when giant mandolins roamed the Earth."

[Billy Mack]

"My gosh, the will never get that thang on the album cover"

[odeman]

"In the old days, I played guitar and a little mandolin. Lately, I've been playing a little guitar and............"

[Bill James]

OK Mr. banjo man...say hello to my little friend!!

[mandroid]

in response to rapid pricing inflation, now you can finally get as much mandolin as you can afford.
http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif http://www.mandolincafe.net/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif

[Psyberbilly]

We'll get that fret job done as soon as we get those old railroad tracks out back torn up ....

[TonyEarth]

"The giants will never miss this." #

For those who missed the reference, this was an often used line in the old "Land of the Giants" TV series in the late 60's. The humans in the drama survived by stealing giant-sized stuff from the giants without getting caught. They would take the stuff and adapt it for thier use. A giant needle became a spear, giant thread became rope, etc.

just saw this! brilliant! i've seen about every episode on that show, even if it was before my time.

[Pikalot]

WHAT? My custon Blue Chip is gonna cost $3500????

[Stinky Old Hat]

When the catalogue said "actual size may vary", they were not kidding!

[Bslot0622]

A sando is a sando but a mando is an instrument

[Nolan]

64621

!!!! News flash !!!!!

"Authorities are on the lookout for a man who was caught on video today holding up a bank with what appeared to be a large ukulele "

[Nolan]

64621

!!!! News flash !!!!!

"Authorities are on the lookout for a man who was caught on video today holding up a bank with what appeared to be a large ukulele "


"Witnesses said he demanded all cash be put in the f holes. He was seen fleeing the scene on foot."

[Matt DeBlass]

"Wait...you wanted a mandolin with a 13 INCH scale length?"

[Ed Goist]

"How will you recognize me? Let's see...I'll be outside the store by the ATM, I'll be wearing a blue shirt and well-worn blue jeans...Medium build, black hair...That's about it...Nothing else really distinguishable."

[ColdBeerGoCubs]

Gibson to appear before a federal grand jury under allegations that used Mandolin Growth Hormone to increase "woof" in it's mandolins.

Roger Clemens not amused.